MacChowder in: Wreck-It Ralph Strikes Back! (Transcript)

Cast

• Chowder as MacLarry Norrius
• Jimmy Neutron as MacBob
• Paini (Chowder) as MacTunia
• Mung Daal (Chowder) as Chog Norrius
• Captain K'nuckles (The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack) as MacScooter
• Buzz Lightyear (Toy Story) as MacNezzer
• Gobo Fraggle (Fraggle Rock) as MacJimmy
• Wembley Fraggle (Fraggle Rock) as Donald
• Wreck-it Ralph as Pompous Maximus
• Philo (Fraggle Rock) as Jean Cladius
• Gunge (Fraggle Rock) as Phillipus
• Woody (Toy Story) as Archimedes
• Patchy the Pirate (SpongeBob SquarePants) as Narrator
• The Once-ler (The Lorax) as Angel

Chapter 1: We're Barber-Barians

• MacChowder: (voice-over) Hello people of the real world! I want you all to turn off your cellphones, the use of any recording device is forbidden, no use of chewing gum during the screening, no talking out loud, and especially, turn down your headphones if you're wearing any. And if you refuse to do so, whether someone in the story you're watching is from Greece or Scotland, he will leap from the screen, lift you from your seat, and drag you far away. So without further ado...
• (JimmyandFriends's Entertainment presents shows up)
• ("MacChowder in: Wreck-It Ralph Strikes Back!" logo shows up)
• Patchy: Hi everyone, how are you doing? Well, just wanted to say; do you remember this inventing Scot, and his name was MacChowder? Well, I do. It's time for another legend about him. So buckle up you young bumpkins, you're in for a tall tale, that of MacChowder and the Stinky Cheese Battle: The Return of Wreck-It Ralph! Now our story takes place in a make-believe land where Scotland and Rome were right next to each other a long, long time ago. So long ago that there weren't any monster trucks or payphones or microwave ovens or anything! There were mostly just friendly villagers, animals and crops - lots and lots of animals and crops! The hero of this story is, once again, MacChowder Norrius. One group of this land were Barber-Barians. Their specialty was giving people awful haircuts.
• Barber-Barians: We'll chop your locks with clippers; then tease 'em up with mousse, we'll never stop our pranking 'till the Romans call a truce! We're Barber-Barians, merry Barber-Barians, practical joke fans, best pranksters in the land! We're Barber-Barians! We're Barber-Barrrrrrr-ians! Terrible haircuts - 2 bits!
• Patchy: The other group was the Romans. Before MacChowder was born, this prank fight has extended for years. But his inventive ideas ticked off his father, Mung Daal, so he made him leave the village. He was kidnapped by vultures and they took him to Rome. While there, he built an enormous bridge machine big enough to cross a gorge. He was then taken captive by the Romans, as the Barber-Barians went in search of the Stinky Cheese. MacChowder then built a cage reverser to get out of the cage he was locked in. Then, just as things got bleak; MacChowder decided to use the bridge machine he built to haul the smelly cheese out of the land. And this is where our story begins...

Chapter 2: MacChowder the Inventor

• Patchy: Every greatness tells a story. And here's one of them. In this case, it is the break of dawn in the nation of Scotland. Mung Daal's son, MacChowder Norrius, was resting when he hears three men talking among themselves. What kind of inventor would wake up in the middle of the night and leave his resting after a long day of working on his contraptions hanging like that?
• (Door knock)
• Puss in Boots: Who is it?
• MacChowder: Your highness, I was wondering if you could help Mung Daal with one of their next battles with Ralph.
• Donkey: It's 2:30 in the morning.
• MacChowder: Yes, but he says that he's my dad.
• Shrek: Well, go back to sleep then!
• MacChowder: Okay.
• Patchy: But Shrek, Donkey and Puss didn't listen. So Chowder tossed them out of his own hut.
• Donkey: You can't do this to us!
• MacChowder: Wanna bet? (Throws a pile of stuff at them)
• Geppetto: Why? Why? Why?!?! Why would you let me be here?
• MacChowder: That jacket makes you feel rugged.
• Geppetto: But it's my birthday!
• MacChowder: So sorry, but his rules are rules. So, good day sir. (Throws him out) He can do what he wants!
• Mung Daal: MacChowder, don't you think that's a bit harsh?
• MacChowder: A bit harsh? No siree. You better think about what I said as you leave Scotland.
• Puss: Okay! (thinks) We can't. We have to do caber toss this afternoon.
• Chowder: No caber toss for you three.
• Donkey: But we need to show off our kilts!
• MacChowder: No showing off your kilts. And no playing bagpipes, eating haggis, raiding the Romans, stone put, Scottish hammer throw, weight throw, nothing! Zilch! Nada!
• Shrek: Oh come on please! (MacChowder slams the door shut) So that's a maybe?
• Mung Daal: Wow. If they got away with it, no one should listen to me, son.
• (Meanwhile, at the Roman Empire)
• Philo: What's this? It appears that MacChowder has tossed out Shrek, Donkey and Puss; to make them leave the Barber-Barian territory.
• Gunge: We should alert Ralph.
• Philo: Hey, Wreck-It Ralph!
• (Wreck-It Ralph comes out of a nearby pile of leaves)
• Wreck-It Ralph: I'm awake! I'm awake. So, what were you saying?
• Gunge: Ralph, MacChowder has had the three of them fired for disobeying Mung Daal's orders.
• Ralph: Three relentless men? Fired for disobedience? That's impossible! Assemble your finest men! We're going to give them a punishment. That is... Banishment to The Fiery Pits of Doom!
• MacChowder: I would not be known if I tossed out all this stuff. I do not need all of it to be happy you know.
• Mung Daal: Right...
• MacChowder: In order to stop this plot, I will need to go beyond some infinity, plus hard work, determination, perseverance, and of course, a little hope. Do you remember that song my grandfather used to sing?
• Mung Daal: The one about puppy dogs?
• MacChowder: No, not that one. The one about how you can be used by God to do great big things even when you're young.
• Mung Daal: I remember that one!

Chapter 3: Mung Daal Barber Barian

• Geppetto: Tell me, where're we going now?
• (MacChowder shoves the pile of stuff into a wheelbarrow as Patchy talks)
• Patchy: Now, I like to eat peanuts and gum. Not everything goes together; like bacon and eggs, peanut butter and jelly, donkeys and trombones; or even goobers in gum. The very next morning, the territory rejoiced for Mung Daal's victory, after he and the Barber-Barians finished another raid with the Romans.
• People: Mung Daal, Mung Daal, his exploits ever glorious! Mung Daal, Mung Daal, returns again victorious! Who bests the Romans with his might, whose strength cannot be matched, who brought vict'ry on this night and claimed the biggest laugh? HO HO HO! MUNG DAAL!
• Mr. Bunny: Who's the big bad wolf afraid of?
• People: MUNG DAAL! Who dreams of clever pranks to try then pulls them brilliantly? Who lifts we Barber-Barians for all the world to see? MUNG (Mung) MUNG (Mung) MUNG (Mung) MUNG DAAL! Mung!
• MacChowder: But you sang this last time!
• (Ground shakes)
• Panini: Does anybody else hear that ominous shaking?
• Ryan: Maybe a bunch of singing rodents are shaking the world.
• Mr. Turner: Or a king with his undying love for bath toys.
• Wembley: What's going on?
• Jimmy Neutron: We didn't shake anything.
• Gobo: Why is the picture shaking?
• Buzz Lightyear: It's making me dizzy.
• Captain K'nucles: Aye!
• MacChowder: It's shaking us.
• (The ground starts to shake more. Ralph and his Roman soldiers arrive)
• Mung Daal: Barber-Barians, the Romans are coming!
• Townspeople: (screaming and running around)
• MacChowder: Are you insane? No, not again!
• Ralph: Hello, Mr. Mung Daal. It's time we strike again.
• MacChowder: I thought you gave up pranking!
• Ralph: We did. But not too many people know about this. We often throw water balloons and pies at each other.
• MacChowder: (Looks around and sees an old train) Time to do my little duty to bring him down! (jumps in train) Sorry, I need to commandeer this train in the name of Norrius!
• Russell: Hey!
• Jimmy Neutron: Wow, that's a runaway train.
• Gobo and Panini: Let's roll!
• MacChowder: Excuse me! Coming through! Excuse the train! Watch out!
• Mung Daal: Oof! Let go of the train!
• (The train escapes the territory as it rams through a souvenir cart Mario runs)
• Mario: Whatever.
• Jessie: Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?
• Mater: (raspberry noise)
• Panini: Slow down there, MacChowder!
• Mung Daal: Stop the train, son!
• MacChowder: But I don't know how to stop!
• Jimmy Neutron: We'll help you. Hold on, Chief!
• Gobo: Cut them up at the front! I got you! (He runs into a photo booth)
• Panini: Hold still!
• MacChowder: Emergency break!
• (CRASH!)
• Mung Daal: Ow.
• MacChowder: All aboard.

Chapter 4: A Cake on My Piano on My Cake

• Mung Daal: MacChowder, my son, let me tell you again about our great enemy, Wreck-it Ralph. Remember when he and I were best friends? And we played together when we were little! That turned to pranking that got out of control, which thus we never spoke again.
• MacChowder: Sure thing, dad. Just finishing up another invention out of this wrecked train. I call this one... "The Groaning South Pole Express 6000".
• Mung Daal: MacChowder! What are you doing wasting time with your book? 
• MacChowder: Umm... I insisted on giving a few options, such as giving a robotic dog a female poodle.
• Mung Daal: Listen, Ralph hates us. If he knew I was your father, he'd hate you too. Then you'd be in terrible danger! Remember son, you mustn't let anyone here know that you're my son, and I like you.
• MacChowder: Gee dad, that's some good advice!
• Mung Daal: MacChowder, I don't even know the future. But God does. Maybe there's a reason. I will come see you again.
• MacChowder: Now that you've seen my clear troubles. I am so scared to die. Please, tell me why... Why can't I be a bigger person too? They may be big, but I'm not. They go, but I fiddle. They must find out why I should've been a bigger person. They say it's what you make. I say it's what to fake. I suck at delivering messages to people. I'm still the worst Barberbarian ever. But just as things get worse, I'd better not get hoarse. Now, I better tell God about my problems!
• Mung Daal: That's it?! The last part doesn't even rhyme!
• MacChowder: That's not important, dad. Remember that time you took that embarrasing snapshot of me, with my very first building set?
• Mung Daal: Yes.
• (Flashback as Chowder growls angrily at his first building set that got destroyed after he built it)
• Baby MacChowder: Grrrr.... Who ever knocked that over should clearly die!
• Once-ler: (off-screen) Hold on, you are not old enough to talk.
• MacChowder: (laughs)
• Mung Daal: I get it.
• (Later...)
• Mung Daal: We finally got the wreck cleaned up.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Oh look. It's MacBowser the Train Wrecker.
• MacChowder: Sorry about that. Well, this busted, and old train costed about more than what's made in a year. So, I'd better send this to Sheriff Woody for repairs.
• Patchy: Hey, despite the debacle with the broken train, MacChowder couldn't stop thinking about the punishment.
• Count Olaf: What if we made Ralph king of the Barber-Barians?
• David Seville: We could definitely murder MacChowder's dad!
• (We go into MacChowder's head)
• Wreck-It Ralph: Friends, romans, country fans, praise me as your king and as your god.
• (Back into reality)
• MacChowder: (Gasp) Oh no. This isn't good. This isn't good at all. They're making plans to kill my dad! I gotta use my secret chewing gum.
• Patchy: So MacChowder collided with Dave and Olaf, before taking the cake.
• Kermit: What are they doing?
• Fix-it Felix, Jr.: This does not help.
• E.B.: I love it.
• Patchy: Even the gum he secretly chewed helped out with this collision.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Why would there be a cake, on my piano, on my cake?!
• MacChowder: Hey, aren't you the most wanted men of the Barber-Barian territory?
• Count Olaf: That's right we are!
• David Seville: And we would've taken over the territory if it wasn't for that meddling inventor!
• MacChowder: It's time to arrest these two guys and throw them in the incinerating barbecue pit of peril: The Fiery Pits of Doom.
• Wreck-it Ralph: Well, what am I supposed to do?
• MacChowder: Maybe you could just sing the puppy song. Puppies, puppies, I really love puppies. They're the cutest things in the world. Puppies, puppies, they're sweet. Puppies, I love you!
• Wreck-it Ralph: Honestly, why would I do that? Do you remember the time we dipped you in fry sauce and stuck you to the backside of an angry eagle?
• Philo: Oh man, that must've been terrible!
• Wreck-it Ralph: Face it, worthless Barber-Barian. You can't stop me! You tried to meet Woody - in prison, but you just got out.
• (MacChowder carries Dave and Olaf towards the fiery volcano)
• MacChowder: Count Olaf, David Seville; for violating the rules of Wreck-it Ralph, and for barging into his empire; which is clearly stated not to do, you're hereby sentenced to be thrown into the furnace and never seen again. Goodbye.
• Count Olaf: Don't we get a phone call?
• MacChowder: Hey guys! You sure are gonna have fun down there!

Chapter 5: Wreck-It Ralph's Song

• Patchy: Just like that, MacChowder got rid of the two conspiracy makers. Why would he do this to them?
• Philo: Well maybe MacChowder Norrius disposed of those dirty looking things.
• Gunge: Yeah! The conspiracy makers said that they were clean, but MacChowder called them dirty.
• Patchy: By the time MacChowder came back, Ralph had already came up with his own sneaky little plan.
• Wreck-It Ralph: MacChowder, I believe you must get a beard.
• MacChowder: How is that possible?
• Wreck-It Ralph: MacChowder, I believe you're high.
• MacChowder: Really?
• Philo and Gunge: But, your highness, "high" doesn't rhyme with "beard".
• Wreck-It Ralph: Then don't let anybody know that I'm making these people go into death traps... From trapdoors and cages, to kings of Iraq.
• MacChowder: I think you should change the idea. This is getting a lot about battling.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Well then, maybe we should send emails and text messages to everyone in the world.
• MacChowder: Uh, computers and cellphones weren't around at this time period.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Oh. Right.
• MacChowder: But if you remember how you trapped me in that big cage; and I built a cage reverser, to get out of the controlling guage...
• Wreck-It Ralph: ...then anyone who doesn't obey MacChowder's dad's orders, and walk among us would be disrespectful to their parents.
• MacChowder: Remember that big prank feud that you and my dad had started? From water balloon ambushes to bad haircuts, those may sound crazy to you than not letting the waters part.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Oh I think what you were trying to say! I think we must act with speed. A simple solution that we must act now.
• MacChowder: After calcuations, you got the thing: sending them to the dreaded fiery furnace of the Barber-Barians, and Romans. Close the deal. As soon as you get your seal.
• Wreck-It Ralph and MacChowder: Then we let this punishment be steep. The fires will be where they sleep.
• (Cut to the globe)
• Choir: For those who walk among them that show no respect.
• Wreck-It Ralph: You better go back home to the village and tell everyone you just made their lives even more miserable, MacChowder.
• Patchy: With that, Ralph let all the messages be sent to the people in the world. They were shocked! 
• (The Barber-Barians scream)
• Jimmy Neutron: Chief! What's a Fiery Pit of Doom?
• Panini: The Romans are coming to get my boyfriend for the roaring flames!
• Mr. Turner: Who are Romans?
• Panini: I don't know!
• Mr. Turner: What's a Fiery Pit of Doom?
• Panini: Don't have a clue.
• Gobo: What's the Fiery Pit of Doom?
• Buzz Lightyear: I don't know.
• Captain K'nuckles: Well, we gotta find out!

Chapter 6: MacChowder Accepts the Challenge

• Patchy: The messages said that MacChowder would be killed by the roaring fire.
• Mung Daal: I can't believe this happened! We'd better strike back! Someone get my wingy helmet!
• Buzz Lightyear: It was humiliating!
• Wembley: Yeah! Humiliating!
• Panini: You know what happens to people who appear before Ralph uninvited!
• Captain K'nuckles: He'd have us for lunch!
• Jimmy Neutron: Chief, why don't you major in being helpful to the Romans?
• Gobo: They're still that mean to us.
• Patchy: Just as everything looked hopeless, MacChowder rode home on the vultures' wagon. That's a fact, Jack!
• MacChowder: Thanks, have a nice day!
• Jimmy Neutron: Good heavens MacChowder, what an awful thing to have happened!
• Panini: I know, Jimmy Neutron.
• Gobo: Goodness. See the reaction on everybody.
• MacChowder: I know right. Remember that good feeling you got when I used the bridge machine I built to haul out the Cheese of Attila out of this territory?
• Jimmy Neutron: Yeah...
• MacChowder: And do you remember that good feeling you got when we decided to get along really well?
• Gobo: Yes so...
• Panini: Still, no person would be big enough to fight Ralph.
• MacChowder: Well, what you said Panini, I can give it a shot!
• Captain K'nuckles: What?
• MacChowder: Remember that day, when I was a newborn and I tried battling a giant nutcracker thing?
• Jimmy Neutron: Yes.
• MacChowder: I succeeded defeating that giant nutcracker without even touching him. So that's why I can be a bigger person, too. 1 Timothy 4:12 says that you shouldn't let others look down on you because you're little, but to set an example for the people who believe in you in speech, love, conduct, faith, and purity. Tell you what, guys. Ralph shall invite me back to his empire for dinner tonight, at 6 p.m. When I come home, an angel will come and tell me to talk with God so that we can end this safely through. Let your freak flag wave, let your freak flag fly, never take it down. Raise it way up high! It's not the choice you made. It's just, how you, were hatched. Yes, it all makes sense now, We may be freaks but we're freaks With teeth and claws and magic wands And together we can stand up to Ralph. We've got magic, we've got power. Who are they to say we're wrong? All the things that make us special Are the things that make us strong What makes us special What makes us special What makes us special Makes us strong Let your freak flag wave Let your freak flag fly Never take it down, never take it down Raise it way up high Let your freak flag fly, fly, fly, fly, fly
• Jimmy Neutron: What could be so hard about defeating the Romans on your own? You're a little different from us. We give people awful haircuts, and that sort of thing.
• Panini: Be careful, MacChowder.
• MacChowder: I will!

Chapter 7: A Dinner Invitation

• Mung Daal: Barber-Barians! As we await our imminent doom, I want you to stand in an orally fashion.
• Patchy: Don't get me wrong. Showing up uninvited before Ralph is a very brave thing to do. But telling them that they're quitters, is especially difficult. What if they never believed him? If they stay, let's just say it's so hot for him. But MacChowder had just the right moment to spring the news on.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Another roll! "Congratulations! You've submitted your entry into the Argentinian Cucumber Competition, a special dance competition that happens every summer in Argentina where every cucumber from across the globe sings and dances for the people wanting to watch them, until they all get tired, hungry and have to go to the bathroom. Collect $100 please." (chuckles)
• MacChowder: Hey, wait a minute! I've sent in my entry not too long ago! Everyone liked it. And I still remember the singing and dancing each cucumber made, and I still dance like them even to this day!
• Philo: MacChowder, we know that you had the need to build up your muscles, so we laid out this big buffet for you.
• MacChowder: Thank you. Now the real reason I brought you over tonight was to... was to... to see if I can invite you over again tomorrow night.
• Wreck-It Ralph, Philo, Gunge and Soldiers: Well sure! Yeah! That sounds fair enough. I'd love to come!
• MacChowder: Oh, and one more thing: I need to test this thing out - the Groaning South Pole Express.
• (MacChowder presses a button and a few skunks come out)
• Wreck-It Ralph: You brought skunks. Nice. Slowly back away in fear, and don't spray your...
• (Cut to the exterior of the building. Explosion sound is heard as all the windows are filled with thick green gas. Philo and Gunge open up one of the gas-filled windows.)
• Philo: Goodness. Smells like plenty of stink bombs.
• Wreck-It Ralph: I said I'm too handsome to be stinky for the rest of my life.
• Patchy: So MacChowder starts to be on his way back to the Barber-Barian territory.
• MacChowder: Ahh... what a day! Wrecking a train, colliding with two conspiracy makers, doing push-ups with my muscles, what a relief to be home at last. Home sweet... (gasp)
• Patchy: As MacChowder came home from dinner; an angel appeared.
• Once-ler: Greetings, MacChowder. I'm an angel.
• MacChowder: The "Angels", huh? I'm a Barber-Barian. Maybe we'll play your team this year.
• Once-ler: No no no, I'm a real angel. Sent from the Lord above. With a message.
• MacChowder: The Lord, Lord?
• Once-ler: The same.
• MacChowder: Pretty cool. I just came from dinner with Wreck-It Ralph and his soldiers, and they invited me over again tomorrow night. What's the word?
• Once-ler: I've been sent from the Lord above to tell you that you must climb up a mountaintop, and speak with God.
• MacChowder: I'm not sure how to do it, but okay. See ya!
• Once-ler: Good luck!
• (Bell rings)
• Director: And... cut! Good take everybody.
• (The camera pans out to reveal the Once-ler is on a soundstage in a studio while the crew is filming)
• Crew: Goodbye.
• Once-ler: What do you mean "goodbye"? Can't you do one more take of this scene?
• Crewman: You should get more screen time than that! He's only a one-off, and not a recurring thing! It's as simple as that, so goodbye. Now, if it's not too much trouble, I would suggest that you go on home, study your parts, learn the script, perfect the action, and be back here tomorrow morning. Not you, MacChowder. Or Wreck-it Ralph, or his French soldiers, or any of the Barber-Barians. You're all good.
• (The crewmen forced the Once-ler out of the studio)

Chapter 8: Little Ones

• (Blue words "Later that same evening" on a white background)
• (Door knock)
• Mung Daal: Come in!
• (Door swings open)
• MacChowder: Dad, I'm back!
• Mung Daal: Son, how'd that meeting with God go?
• MacChowder: It went superb. He told me that the only way to defeat him is to invite all my friends to come throw Ralph into the fiery pits of doom.
• Mung Daal: Really! So, you've learned you lesson about why you can be a bigger person too.
• MacChowder: Well God is bigger, Mr. Mung Daal! He's bigger than the boogeyman, Wreck-It Ralph, or even the monsters we talk around the campfire. He's watching over me and you. With his help, young ones can go for the big, big things. You're big, but I'm not.
• Mung Daal: Yes, but Wreck-It Ralph, he's...
• MacChowder: He's big. By now I've learned that why I can be a person whose big! He's big. Didn't ask you to part the waters; but I can now concentrate on great things you Barber-Barians can do.
• Mung Daal: But didn't you do this last time?
• MacChowder: Yes, I did. I helped you two feuding tribes get along when removing the Cheese of Attila! So, you better go home and get ready for tomorrow's expedition, and we'll meet up at dawn.
• Mung Daal: Uh, okay!

Chapter 9: MacChowder's Bravery

• Patchy: It seems as though MacChowder has learned his lesson on how anything is possible with God on his side. But if he, Mung Daal, and the Barber-Barians are gonna be saved, MacChowder's got to come through. And he's only got one more chance.
• Wreck-It Ralph: I wonder where MacChowder could be?
• MacChowder: Hi, sorry I'm late. The reason I called you here again tonight is to... is to... to... (clears throat) to see if someone was plotting against me.
• Philo: Who would dare?
• MacChowder: It's none other than Wreck-It Ralph!
• Pachy: So MacChowder and Wreck-It Ralph used a really big megaphone to get everyone's attention.
• MacChowder: Good people of Greece, and Scotland! I have decided to help you all with having Ralph get consumed by the flames.
• Barber-Barians and Romans: Yea!
• Wreck-It Ralph: What? Me? I didn't do anything wrong!
• Mung Daal: Not if we have anything to say about it.
• Wreck-It Ralph: You mean, after letting our two kingdoms be at peace, you had me kill your own son!?!?
• Jimmy Neutron, Panini, Gobo, Wembley, Captain K'nuckles, and Buzz: Serves him right.
• Woody: Well, he did send that train to me for repairs so...
• MacChowder: Ah, bad news Barberbarians. The South Pole Express, my latest invention, broke down during the parade I had this afternoon.
• Jimmy Neutron, Panini and Gobo: You had a parade, MacChowder?!
• MacChowder: Because of my latest invention breaking down, I can't do the 'Spooked Myself Up for Halloween' song.
• Jimmy Neutron: Oh man!
• MacChowder: That's alright. Well at least I tested it out last night!
• Woody: You placed skunks into your machine? I had something like this done a few years back.
• Panini: And it took these soldiers all morning to clear the gas off of all these windows.
• Gobo: (with a nose pin) Still smelt like tuna, with a hint of eggs.
• Mung Daal: And if you didn't throw out those three men for insubordination, son... (sigh) then this wouldn't have happened.
• MacChowder: Come on everybody. We've got some dead meat to throw.
• Philo: Does that involve turning your bridge machine into a catapult again?
• MacChowder: Not this time.
• (Cut to later where all the Barber-Barians and Romans are carrying Wreck-It Ralph, as MacChowder is sitting in the column carried by the soldiers)
• Wreck-It Ralph: Hold it, Barber-Barians; you can't say no to everything!
• MacChowder: Well, despite that this edict stated that a guard was seen eating grapes, despite him being one; there're plenty of reasons why no person can't say no to anything they know!
• (MacChowder's edict shows a picture of a guard he mentioned eating too many grapes and getting fat.)
• Guard on Edict: I didn't eat my salad.
• Philo: But...
• MacChowder: You can trust me. You've met your match Ralph!
• Wreck-It Ralph: I feel like my heart's been ripped out and run over by a Mack truck, then exploded by a bomb and thrown into a blender. And then got eaten up by a giant whale.
• Jimmy Neutron: For your punishment, Wreck-It Ralph...
• Gobo: ...you are to be sent...
• Panini: ...to the fiery pits of doom...
• Buzz Lightyear: ...along with anyone else...
• Wembley and Captain K'nuckles: ...who dare scheme against...
• Mung Daal: ...my own son. Right! Romans, prepare to meet your second worse nightmare ever! Go ahead son, show them what inner worth's made of.
• MacChowder: Danger. Danger. You have initiated self-destruct sequence alpha. Self-destruct sequence is now engaged. This unit will yield a megaton nuclear blast in exactly twenty seconds. Please clear a square mile area. Thank you and have a nice day. Twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, fourteen, thirteen, twelve, eleven, ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one! You're going down, Ralph. And your French soldiers too.
• Roman Soldier: We are actually Swedish!
• Gobo: You're not Swedish.
• Patchy: So MacChowder commanded the fiery pits to be heated seven times hotter. They threw Ralph in.
• Wreck-It Ralph: Noooooo! If you want to get thrown into the fiery pits, don't encourage your friends to help you!
• Patchy: The fire was so hot it killed his soldier guards! And so, Wreck-It Ralph got what was coming to him; and then some. Then they buried his remains underwater. A few of the Barber-Barians covered the volcano with a boulder.
• Gobo, Jimmy Neutron, Buzz, Captain K'nuckles, Wembley, and Panini: Since the fire's killed those soldiers; somebody's gotta carry that column.
• Mung Daal: That was great son. When you have faith, anything is possible, like battling giants.
• MacChowder: Thanks for your sage advise, Dad.
• Mung Daal: Barber-Barians, let's go home!
• Barber-Barians: He may be poor with pranking, brute force is not his thing. But when you need a problem solved, then just give him a ring! A Barber-Barian, merry Barber-Barian. He's an ideal man, best inventor in the land. Barber-Barian!
• Patchy: So MacChowder has saved his people. He may have been a small person, but he has a big heart, and...
• MacChowder: ...with God, all things are possible. Correct!
• Mung Daal: I've said this before, and I'll say it again. Barber-Barians, no more pranking! Let our two kingdoms be at peace!
• Barber-Barians: MacChowder Norrius! So glorious!! Your inventions proved victorious! Young Norrius! You're glorious!! Bringing peace to all of us! Whose cleverness befriends the foe, whose smarts are clear to see? Who did God make special when He made him wonderfully? MacChowder, MacChowder, MacChowder, MacChowder Norrius! MacChowder Norrius!
• Patchy: The end!
• (Fade to black)
• MacChowder: Oh well, Wreck-it Ralph is now in the fiery pits now. The Barber-Barians are back to their happy lives as before and, so what am I supposed to do here guys? Is it over? Is the show over? Guys? There's probably someone asking me to go to some strange planet for a little entertainment with some guardians, and there's probably a group of people known as "Marigolds" that three chipmunk-like things have to go after eventually. Even though this is 1999, and the former might happen in 2001 and then the latter might happen in 2002 or something. So that means I might have something to do! That shouldn't take long! Guys? Hello? Is anyone there? Is this thing on?

Chapter 10: Closing Credits

• Directed by JimmyandFriends
• Written by John A. Davis
• Produced by John Lasseter, Rumen Petkov and Cory Edwards
• Musical Score Composed and Produced by Kurt Heinecke
• (JimmyandFriends's Entertainment shows up)
• (Fade to black)