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This is a transcript for Monsters, Inc. (Playhouse Disney Style).

Scene 1: Monsters in the Closet/Pete

  • (The camera fades in to the little boy's bedroom, at night. We see the toys on the shelf.)
  • Mother: (o.s.) Good night, sweetheart.
  • Little Boy: (o.s.) Good night, mom.
  • Father: (o.s.) Sleep tight, kiddo.
  • (The bedroom light clicks off. Soft moonlight illuminates the room. A little boy snuggles into bed as his parents' footsteps fade away from the hall. All is quiet. The closet door creaks open. The boy looks around the room, nervously, eyes growing wide. Suddenly, he spies a tentacle, emerging from the closet. The boy turns away in fear, but a second look reveals it to be just a shirt sleeve. He relaxes back into bed. A dark shadow cuts across the bedspread. From under the bed, a pair of evil red eyes peer out. Rising up behind the boy, preparing to scare his young victim, towers a fearsome monster. The boy sees the monster and screams. Baxter Bevel, horrified by the child, lets out an even more blood curling scream of his own. He backs away and slips on a soccer ball, which ricochets off the wall and beans him squarely on the face. He stumbles back onto a skateboard, slips, and lands on a pile of jacks. Crazed with pain, Baxter Bevel runs around the room, squealing and holding his backside.)
  • Computerized Voice: (o.s.) Simulation terminated. Simulation terminated.
  • (Worklights flash on, flooding the room with light. The boy, now revealed to be an animatronic, winds down and resets. One wall of the bedroom starts to rise, revealing the bedroom to be just a set, a simulator where monsters practice their scare tactics. Behind a control console sits an evaluator, the dragon-like Mrs. Triangle Judging by her tone, she's been through this before.)
  • Mrs. Triangle: Alright, Mr. Bevel, is it?
  • Baxter Bevel: Uh, my friends call me Baxter.
  • Mrs. Triangle: Uh-huh. Mr. Bevel, can you tell me what you did wrong?
  • Baxter Bevel: I fell down?
  • Mrs. Triangle: No, no, before that. Can anyone tell me Mr. Bevel's big mistake? Anyone?
  • (Mrs. Triangle addresses a panel of pathetic looking recruits, seated behind her. They stare back at her blankly.)
  • Pat: (coughs)
  • Mrs. Triangle: (frustrated) Let's take a look at the tape. Here we go.
  • (Mrs. Triangle rewinds the tape, then plays it. On the monitor, Baxter Bevel sneaks into the bedroom, leaving the door open. The image freezes.)
  • Mrs. Triangle: Right... there. See? The door! You left it wide open.
  • Tools and Baxter Bevel: Oooh.
  • Mrs. Triangle: And leaving a door open is the worst mistake any employee can make because...?
  • Baxter Bevel: Um... It could... Let in a draft?
  • Pete: It could let in a child.
  • (Pete, CEO of Monsters, Inc., steps from the shadows.)
  • Mrs. Triangle: Oh! Pete!
  • Pete: There is nothing more toxic or deadly than a human child. A single touch could kill you!
  • (Baxter Bevel shuffles nervously away from the animatronic kid.)
  • Pete: Leave a door open, and a child could walk right into this factory. Right into the monster world!
  • (One of the tools loses it, leaping into the lap of the monster next to him.)
  • Rusty: I won't go in a kid's room. You can't make me.
  • (Pete grabs a nearby yellow scream can.)
  • Pete: You're going in there because we need this.
  • (Pete unlocks the can, and the sound of children's scream leak out. The lights surge, and monitors crackle. The tools cover their ears. Pete corks the can.)
  • Pete: Our city is counting on you to collect those children's screams. Without scream, we have no power. Yes, it's dangerous work, and that's why I need you to be at your best. I need scarers who are confident, tenacious, tough, intimidating. I need scarers like... like Bear.

Scene 2: Morning Workout

  • (Bear is seen sleeping in his bed as the alarm clock switches to 6:05 a.m.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey! Good morning, Monstropolis. It's now five after the hour of 6:00 A.M. in the big monster city. Temperature's a balmy 65 degrees, which is good news for you reptiles, and it looks like it's gonna be a perfect day to maybe, hey, just lie in bed, sleep in, or simply... (gets annoyed) WORK OUT THAT FLAB THAT'S HANGING OVER THE BED!!! GET UP, BEAR!!!! (uses an air horn, waking up Bear)
  • Bear: (screaming) Ahhhhh!
  • (In the living room, Bear drops to the floor for push-ups. Mickey stands in front of him barking orders like a coach.)
  • Bear: I don't believe I ordered a wake-up call, Mickey.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, less talk, more pain, marshmallow boy! Feel the burn!
  • (Between each push-up, Bear springs into the air, striking a fearsome pose and roaring.)
  • Mickey Mouse: You call yourself a monster?
  • (Bear roars louder. Later, Bear jogs in place.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Scary feet, scary feet, scary feet-- Oop! The kid's awake!
  • (Bear drops to the ground and lies motionless, then jogs again.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, scary feet, scary feet, scary feet, scary feet, scar-- Kid's asleep!
  • (Bear roars.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Twins! In a bunk bed!
  • (Bear goes up and down, roaring on two levels.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Ooh, I thought I had you there.
  • (Later, Mickey holds a broom with a crude drawing of a child's face taped to the end.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, Bear, here we go. You ready? Follow it!
  • (Mickey swings the broom, Bear lunges after it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh! It's over here! Oh! Look over there! (gasps) Don't let the kid touch you! Don't let it touch you!
  • (Bear growls at the paper kid while dodging it. Later, like a quarterback rushing a tackle dummy, Bear strains to push a pile of heavy furniture across the living room. Mickey stands atop the pile encouraging him.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (singing like a Drill Sergeant) I don't know, but it's been said. I love scaring kids in bed!
  • (Later in the bathroom, Bear brushes his teeth, while Mickey stands on his arm.)
  • Mickey Mouse: C'mon, fight that plaque! Fight that plaque! Scary monsters don't have plaque!
  • (Later in the living room, Bear hangs upside-down from a beam, doing some "gravity" sit-ups.)
  • Mickey Mouse: One-eighteen. Do you have one-nineteen? Do I see one-twenty? Oh, I don't believe it!
  • Bear: I'm not even breaking a sweat.
  • Mickey Mouse: Not you! Look! The new commercial's on.
  • (Mickey runs to the TV, Bear slips and falls. On the TV, a bank of lights illuminate and flare brightly.)
  • Announcer: (v.o.) The future is bright at Monsters Incorporated.
  • (Mickey and Bear scramble into their chairs to watch the commercial).
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm in this one. I'm in this one!
  • (On the TV, there are beautiful shots of monsters happily living their lives.)
  • Announcer: (v.o.) We're part of your life. We power your car. We warm your home. We light your city.
  • (Polina Polie turns to the camera.)
  • Polina Polie: I'm Monsters Incorporated!
  • (Bear watches from his easy chair.)
  • Bear: (points to the screen) Hey, look! Polina!
  • (On the TV, a bored child watches as various monsters cycle past. We settle on Cap’n Crane which causes the child to scream.)
  • Announcer: (v.o.) Carefully matching every child to their ideal monster, to produce superior scream, refined into clean, dependable energy. Every time you turn something on, Monsters Incorporated is there.
  • Percy Polie: (to camera) I'm Monsters Incorporated!
  • (On the TV, a child is vacantly staring at a television set. Machine gun fire, explosions, etc. are heard emerging from the set. Text appears on the screen: "Simulation-Not Actual Child.")
  • Announcer: (v.o.) We know the challenge. The window of innocence is shrinking. Human kids are harder to scare.
  • (On the TV, Pete, a large cat, turns to face the camera.)
  • Pete: (to camera) Of course. MI is prepared for the future. With the top scarers...
  • (On the screen, Bear stands next to a door standing on a factory work floor, known as the Scare Floor. He leans next to the door, opens the door and roars. The kid inside screams. Mickey watches his buddy on TV and leaps to his feet.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoo-hoo-hoo! Ha-ha!
  • Pete: (on TV) ...the best refineries, and research into new energy techniques.
  • (On the TV, a monster with virtual reality glasses roars, causing a computer child on a monitor behind him to scream. Mickey scoots to the edge of his seat in anticipation.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, here I come.
  • (On the TV, Mickey and Bear stand in front of a crowd of MI workers. As they turn to the camera, the Monsters, Inc. logo appears over Mickey, blocking him entirely.)
  • Bear: (on TV) We're working for a better tomorrow... today!
  • (Mickey stares at the TV, shocked.)
  • Monsters: (on TV) We're Monsters Incorporated!
  • Pete: We're MI, Monsters Incorporated. We scare because we care.
  • (Bear turns off the TV.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (in shock) I can't believe it.
  • Bear: (consoling) Oh, Mickey.
  • Mickey Mouse: I was on TV! Ha. Did you see me? I'm a natural!
  • (As Mickey was amazed to see himself on TV, the phone rings, and Mickey grabs the receiver.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hello? I know! Wasn't I great?! Did the whole family see it? (to Bear) It's your mom. (to phone) Ha-ha, what can I say? The camera loves me.

Scene 3: Monstropolis

  • (Outside of Monstropolis, at morning, the sun rises over Monstropolis, an industry town much like Pittsburgh. Its ancient history is seen in the architecture. Frank, a newspaper delivery monster tosses a paper on the stoop of Mickey and Bear's apartment building. Mickey and Bear walk out the door, with lunch boxes in their hands.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm telling you, big daddy. You're gonna be seeing this face on TV a lot more often.
  • Bear: Yeah, like on "Monstropolis' Most Wanted"?
  • Mickey Mouse: Ha, ha, ha, ha. You've been jealous of my good looks since the fourth grade, pal.
  • (They walk by a tiny otter couple.)
  • Ernest Otter: Have a good day, sweetie.
  • Opal Otter: You too, hon.
  • (Opal Otter flies away. Later at the curbside, Mickey approaches a shiny new convertible and holds up a set of keys.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoo! Okay, Bear, hop on in.
  • Bear: Nope. Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, where are you going? What are you doing?
  • Bear: Mickey, there's a scream shortage. We're walking.
  • Mickey Mouse: Walking?!
  • Bear: Yup. (Bear grabs Mickey's arm, gets him off the car, and drags him away.) Come on!
  • Mickey Mouse: (being dragged away) No, no, no, no! My baby! Look! She needs to be driven! (to car) Bye, baby! I'll call you!
  • (Later at the Monstropolis street, the camera closes on a newspaper stand with headline: "ROLLING BLACKOUTS EXPECTED." Mickey and Bear walk past.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, genius, you wanna know why I bought the car?
  • Bear: Not really.
  • Mickey Mouse: To drive it! You know, like on the street, with the honk-honk, and the vroom-vroom, and no walking involved?
  • Bear: Wa, wa, wa, wa. Give it a rest, will you, butterball? Come on, you could use the exercise.
  • Mickey Mouse: I could use the exercise? Look at you! You have your own climate.
  • (Later, the Goofy Planets jump rope as Mickey and Bear pass.)
  • Goofy Planets: (chanting) How many tentacles can jump the rope? One and two and three and four...
  • (The rope is actually one of the planet's tongues.)
  • Yellowish Gold Sun Star: Morning, Mickey! Morning, Bear!
  • Bear: Hey, morning, planets. How're you doing?
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, planets.
  • Teal Egg Shaped Planet: (turning her head) Bye, Mickey! Bye, Bear!
  • (The light blue caterpillar planet gets tangled in the tongue rope and lies into Pooh watching from a window.)
  • Winnie the Pooh: Ow! Hey!
  • (Later at the Monstropolis storefront, Sammy sweeps garbage off the sidewalk into a dustpan. He happily tosses the contents into his mouth. Archie reading a newspaper sneezes, and fires shoots from his mouth and nose, incinerating his newspaper.)
  • Archie: Aw, nuts.
  • (Later at the Monstropolis grocery store, Oso arranges fruit on a stand with his hands.)
  • Oso: Hey, fellas!
  • Mickey Mouse: (Italian accent) Hey, Oso! Hey, hey, hey! Oso! Pow-pow-pow-pow-pow!
  • Bear: Oso! Bada-bing!
  • Oso: (chuckling) I hear somebody's close to breaking the all-time scare record.
  • Bear: Aw, just trying to make sure there's enough scream to go around.
  • (Oso tosses Mickey and Bear two pieces of fruit.)
  • Oso: Hey! On the house.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, thanks!
  • Bear: Grazie!
  • Mickey Mouse: Bada-bing! Follow me!
  • (Mickey and Bear pass Tigger who suddenly oozes through a grate and into the sewer below, leaving only eyes and teeth a top the grate.)
  • Tigger: Oh, great.
  • (Later at the Monstropolis cross-walk, Mickey and Bear wait to cross next to a giant creature, Eeyore. Because of his height, we only see Eeyore's massive legs.)
  • Bear: (yelling up to Eeyore) Hey, Eeyore! Good morning!
  • (Eeyore answers. The traffic sign changes from "DON'T STALK" to "STALK", replacing the red hand and the green monster walking. Mickey, Bear and Eeyore cross.)
  • Bear: See that, Mickey? Eeyore's walking to work.
  • Mickey Mouse: Big deal. Guy takes five steps and he's there.
  • (The camera pans to the billboard advertising Monsters, Inc.)

Scene 4: Monsters, Inc.

  • (The Monsters Incorporated parking lot fills with cars as workers stream into the enormous building. In the lobby, various Playhouse Disney employees greet Mickey and Bear as they enter.)
  • George: Morning, Bear!
  • Bear: Morning, George!
  • Percy Polie: Hey, it's the Bearster!
  • Bear: See you on the scare floor, buddy!
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, Marge! How was jury duty?
  • Employee #1: Morning, Bear!
  • Employee #2: How're you doing, big guy?
  • Bear: 'Ey!
  • (Twelve scarer of the month photographs -- all of Bear -- hang on a wall. Two geeky characters, Goofy and Donald Duck, straighten one of them.)
  • Goofy: Hey! It's still leaning to the left!
  • Donald Duck: It is not!
  • Bear: Hey, fellas! Hey, Percy!
  • Percy Polie: (o.s.) Morning!
  • (The geeks hear Bear's voice and run up to him.)
  • Goofy: Hey, Mr. Bear!
  • Bear: Guys, I told you, call me Bear.
  • (The geeks laugh like school girls.)
  • Donald Duck: I don't think so.
  • Goofy: We just wanted to wish you good luck today.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Come on, get lost, you two. You're making him lose his focus.
  • Goofy: (worried) Oh, sorry.
  • Bear: See you later, fellas.
  • (Bear heads off with Mickey.)
  • Donald Duck: (calling after) Go get 'em, Mr. Bear!
  • Goofy: Quiet! You'll make him lose his focus.
  • Donald Duck: Oh, no. (calling after again) Sorry!
  • Goofy: Shut up!
  • (At the reception desk, Minnie Mouse is answering phone calls.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Monsters, Inc., please hold. Monsters, Inc., I'll connect you. Ms. Fearmonger is on vacation, would you like her voicemail?
  • (Mickey and Bear approach the desk.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, Schmoopsie-Poo?
  • (Minnie turns with a big, bright smile. So do a collection of snakes, which we now realize make up Minnie's ears.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Googly Bear!
  • (Her snakes sigh contentedly.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Happy birthday.
  • Minnie Mouse: Oh, Googly-Woogly, you remembered!
  • (Minnie leans forward and gently rubs Mickey's head. They're nauseatingly cute together.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (to Bear) Hey, Bear-Wear.
  • Bear: (uncomfortable) Oh, hey, Minnie... Winnie. (clears throat) Happy birthday.
  • Minnie Mouse: Thanks. (to Mickey) So, uh, are we going anywhere special tonight?
  • Mickey Mouse: I just got us into a little place called, um, "Harryhausen's."
  • Minnie Mouse: (gasps) Harryhausen's?! But it's impossible to get a reservation there.
  • Mickey Mouse: Not for Googly Bear.
  • (Minnie giggles. So do the snakes.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I will see you at quittin' time and not a minute later.
  • Minnie Mouse: Okay, sweetheart.
  • Mickey Mouse: Think romantical thoughts. (singing and dancing out of the lobby) ♪ You and me, me and you, both of us together! ♪

Scene 5: Gloomius Maximus

  • (In the locker room, Mickey opens his locker door and grabs a giant, clear bowl.)
  • Mickey Mouse: You know, pal, she's the one. That's it. She is the one!
  • Bear: I'm happy for you.
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, and, uh, thanks for hooking me up with those reservations.
  • (Mickey puts the giant bowl -- his contact lens -- into his eye.)
  • Bear: Oh, no problem. They're under the name "Googly Bear."
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, good id- (catching the joke) You know, that wasn't very funny.
  • (Mickey's locker suddenly slams by itself. Confused, Mickey opens it. It slams shut again.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (confused) What the...?
  • (A weird pirate named Gloomius Maximus, uncamouflages and jumps out at Mickey.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: MICKEY MOUSE!
  • Mickey Mouse: Ahhhhh!
  • (Mickey flies backwards, tripping over the bench.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (laughs) What do you know? It scares little kids and little monsters.
  • Mickey Mouse: I wasn't scared, I have... allergies. (fakes a cough)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Uh-huh, sure.
  • Bear: Hey, Gloomius. Save it for the scare floor, will you?
  • (Gloomius performs a series of martial art moves.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: I'm in the zone today, Bear. I'm going to be doing some serious scaring, putting up some big numbers.
  • Mickey Mouse: Wow, Gloomius, that's great. That should make it even more humiliating when we break the record first. Ha-ha!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. Do you hear that?
  • (Gloomius pauses for a dramatic effect.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: It's the winds of change.
  • (Gloomius exits. Mickey watches him go, smoldering.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (mocking) "You hear that? You hear the winds of cha--?" (stops mocking) What a creep. One of these days, I am really... gonna let you teach that guy a lesson.

Scene 6: The Scare Floor

  • (In the M.I. hallway, Doc Hogg mops up a puddle of green slime. He exits, leaving a trail of more slime. Mickey walks in.)
  • Mickey: Doc Hogg. Baby.
  • (Kindly Lady is reading a newspaper.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Good morning, Kindly Lady, my succulent little garden snail. And who would we be scaring today?
  • (Mickey reaches for paperwork on the desk, but Kindly Lady's wet hand lands on it first. She's a polie lady with glasses and a pink bow.)
  • Kindly Lady: (sternly) Mickey Mouse! You didn't file your paperwork last night.
  • Mickey Mouse: (coy) Oh, that darn paperwork! Wouldn't it be easier if it all just blew away?
  • (Kindly Lady leans forward in her chair threateningly.)
  • Kindly Lady: Don't let it happen again.
  • Mickey Mouse: Yes, well, uh, I'll try to be less careless.
  • (Mickey grabs the paperwork and shuffles away.)
  • Kindly Lady: (calling after Mickey) I'm watching you, Mickey Mouse. Always watching. Always.
  • Mickey Mouse: (to self) Ooh, she's nuts.
  • (Mickey walks onto the Scare Floor, already bustling with activity)
  • Minnie Mouse: (o.s., over paging system) All scare floors are now active. Assistants, please report to your stations.
  • (Mickey fits an empty can onto his door station. Mickey swipes a card-key from a child's folder, and slides it through a slot on the station. A child's closet door rides out into the Scare Floor on an overhead track. Several assistants follow suit. Doors ride out of the vault and land in stations. A Jumbo-tron screen displaying the MI logo switches over to a map. The eastern portion of the United States is illuminated as Percy steps up.)
  • Percy Polie: Okay, people, Eastern Seaboard coming online. We got scarers coming out!
  • (The assistants run to their stations and stand at attention. The scarers stride onto the Scare Floor in slow motion. These are the best of the best; the top Scarers, ready for action. Donald Duck and Goofy, two geeky teenage janitors stand in awe on the sidelines.)
  • Goofy: Oh, they're so awesome!
  • (The Scarers stop opposite their doors. Their assistants approach them and make last minute preparations. Bear cracks his knuckles and shakes to keep it loose. Cap'n Crane flips out his retractable claws like switchables. Tigger is handed a set of false teeth. He slides the chompers into place and snarls. Gloomius practices camouflaging by blending into various background patterns: wood, brick, wallpaper. His nerdy assistant Screwy alternates the patterns. Walter Raccoon puts a hand in his mouth and blows. Spikes pop out of his skin. George opens his mouth to reveal a giant set of spiked teeth. His assistant brushes them. Eeyore grabs a handful of eyeballs from his assistant and squishes them into his face. One of the eyeballs falls off Eeyo's face, and his assistant puts it back on. The Jumbo-tron now shows everyone's scare totals. Bear is at the top, with Gloomius in second place.)
  • Bear: (with hand outstretched) Hey, may the best monster win.
  • Gloomius Maximus: (turning away) I plan to.
  • (Percy begins the countdown.)
  • Percy Polie: We are on in seven, six,
  • (Mickey hits a button on his keypad. The red light above his door lights up. Other assistants do the same.)
  • Percy Polie: five, four, three, two...
  • (Percy silently indicates "one" with his hand. A sign light above the Scare Floor changes from "STANDBY" to "SCARE", replacing the red monster to a green monster. The scaring begins. A horn sounds, and each scarer rushes up to their door. Bear disappears through the door.)
  • Mickey Mouse: You're the boss, you're the boss, you're the big hairy boss.
  • (Gloomius and the other characters follow suit. Screams are heard from Bear's inside door. Bear exits and checks his new scare totals on the jumbo-tron.)
  • Bear: Oh, I'm feeling good today, Mickey!
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoa! Attaboy. Attaboy. Another door comin' right up.
  • (A scream comes from another door. Gloomius emerges to watch his tally go up, but only slightly. Gloomius' assistant Screwy scratches his head.)
  • Screwy: Hmm, you're still behind, Gloomius. You know, maybe I should re-align the scream intake valve...?
  • Gloomius Maximus: Just get me another door!
  • Screwy: Aah! A door! Yes! Door! (runs off)
  • (The characters work fast and furious. Children's screams are heard everywhere, filling the cans. Pete walks up besides Percy.)
  • Pete: (expecting the worse) Well, Percy, what's the damage so far?
  • Percy Polie: We may actually make our quota today, sir.
  • Pete: Hmm. First time in a month.
  • (A scream can gurgles as it registers empty. Rock music pounds as the door opens and Cap'n Crane scrambles out of the room, sobbing pathetically.)
  • Professor von Drake: What happened?
  • Cap'n Crane: The kid almost touched me! She got this close to me!
  • Professor von Drake: She wasn't scared of you??! (looks through paperwork) She was only six!
  • Cap'n Crane: I could've been dead! I could've DIED!!!!
  • (Professor von Drake slaps him across the face.)
  • Professor von Drake: Keep it together, man! (whistles for help) Hey, we got a dead door over here!
  • (Goofy and Donald Duck come running, wheeling a portable door shredder.)
  • Goofy: We're coming! Look out!
  • Donald Duck: Out of the way! Excuse us.
  • Goofy: Coming through.
  • (Goofy tapes a yellow "X" across the door.)
  • Percy Polie: (to Pete) We've lost fifty-eight doors this week, sir.
  • Pete: Oh, kids these days. They just don't get scared like they used to.
  • (Goofy and Donald Duck load the defunct door into the shredder.)
  • Goofy: Let 'er rip!
  • (The door shreds with a buzz, spewing out sawdust and leaving only two door knobs. Bungo runs toward a door with his hands flying.)
  • Bungo: Bugabugabuga!
  • (Gloomius emerges from another door. He's working hard.)
  • Screwy: (nervous) Uh, sir?
  • Gloomius Maximus: What?!
  • Screwy: L-look!
  • (Screwy points to the tally board. Gloomius' name replaces Bear's as number one.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (o.s., over P.A. system) Attention. We have a new scare leader, Gloomius Maximus.
  • (Wolfie, Scootch Raccoon, and Taxicrab gather around Gloomius, congratulating him.)
  • Wolfie, Scootch Raccoon, and Taxicrab: Nice job! You took the lead! You did it! Look at those numbers!
  • (Multiple screams draw the attention of the admirers. In seconds, Mickey deftly fills can after can with scream. Bear emerges from the door and cracks his knuckles.)
  • Bear: Slumber party.
  • (The tally board updates; Bear's back in first place.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (o.s., over P.A. system) Never mind.
  • (Wolfie, Scootch Raccoon, and Taxicrab push past Gloomius as they rush to Bear.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (being jolted) Hey, watch it!
  • Wolfie, Scootch Raccoon, and Taxicrab: That was awesome! How did you do that? You're going to the hall of fame for sure!
  • (Bear gives his fans a high five as Pete approaches.)
  • Pete: Well, Bear, that was an impressive display.
  • Bear: Oh, just doing my job, Pete. Of course, I did learn from the best.
  • (Pete and Bear both chuckle. Gloomius watches angrily. Screwy stands next to him.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: If I don't see a new door in my station in five seconds, I will personally put you THROUGH THE SHREDDER!!!
  • Screwy: Aaaaah! (runs off)

Scene 7: 23-19!

  • (Wolfie, the assistant at the next station, turns to Mickey.)
  • Wolfie: Hey, Mickey, nice job. Those numbers are pretty sweet.
  • Mickey Mouse: (false modesty) Are they? You know, I hadn't even noticed. And, uh, how's Professor Buffalo doing?
  • Wolfie: He's doing great! I love working with that big guy.
  • (Wolfie's door opens, and a brown buffalo named Professor Buffalo emerges.)
  • Professor Buffalo: Keep the doors comin', Wolfie. I'm on a roll today.
  • Wolfie: (to Mickey) Professor Buffalo and I are like brothers. (he spots a child's sock on Professor Buffalo's back.) (gasps) 23-19!! WE HAVE A 23-19!!!!
  • (Percy hits a human child emergency button. A siren blares. The Jumbo-tron reads "WARNING: CONTAMINATION ALERT", replacing the yellow circle with a black child inside.)
  • Computer voice: (over P.A.) Red alert! Red alert! Red alert! Red alert! Red alert!
  • (Professor Buffalo looks around, confused. On the Jumbo-tron behind him is a security cam view of Professor Buffalo's back, showing the sock.)
  • Computer voice: (over P.A.) Professor Buffalo, please remain motionless. Prepare for decontamination.
  • (Professor Buffalo realizing he caused the alarms, and he tries frantically to remove the sock.)
  • Professor Buffalo: Get it off! Get it off!
  • Percy Polie: Duck and cover, people!
  • (Gloomius Maximus' robotic henchmen figures known as the baddies rappel through the windows from the ceiling overhead.)
  • Pete: Oh, not the Baddies.
  • (Outside of Monsters, Inc., helicopters hover over the factory as large black trucks squeal into the parking lot. On the sides of the trucks is printed: CDA - CHILD DETECTION AGENCY. More Baddies agents burst out of the truck and run toward the factory. Kindly Lady closes her desk window as Baddie agents run by.)
  • Baddie agent #1: Move, move, move! Coming through, please. Stand aside.
  • Baddie agent #2: Please clear the contaminated area.
  • (The Scare Floor is now filled with Baddie agents. One points a child detector at Goofy and Donald Duck.)
  • Goofy and Donald Duck: Aaaaah!
  • Baddie agent #3: This is a 23-19 in progress.
  • Baddie agent #4: Keep the area clear.
  • Baddie agent #5: Coming through. Watch yourself.
  • (Baddie agents run up to Professor Buffalo and tackle him to the ground. Using tongs, they gently remove the sock from his back.)
  • Baddie agent: Stand back. Careful.
  • (They place the sock on the floor. A metal dome is bolted over the sock. A Baddie agent presses a button. Pete and the workers cover their eyes. Mickey gasps as a blinding flash emerges from under the metal device. Agents unbolt the dome and vacuum up the charred remains of the sock.)
  • Baddie agent #1: All clear. Situation is niner-niner-zero. Ready for decon.
  • Professor Buffalo: (to Baddie agents) Hey, thanks, guys, that was a close one.
  • Baddie agent #2: (to other agents) Okay.
  • (A circular shower curtain flies up around Professor Buffalo. A yellow hand reaches in with a huge electric razor. Professor Buffalo's fur flies up over the curtain.)
  • Professor Buffalo: Ahhhhh!
  • (A small shower head pops up, spraying disinfectant.)
  • Professor Buffalo: Eiieeee!
  • (The curtain flies open. Professor Buffalo is entirely shaved, wearing an Elizabethan dog collar. A band-aid covers the area "contaminated" by the sock. An agent rips the band-aid off.)
  • Professor Buffalo: Ahhhhh!!
  • (A sign on the wall reading "DAYS SINCE LAST ACCIDENT" flips from 47 to 0.)
  • Percy Polie: Okay, people, take a break! We gotta shut down for a half-hour and reset the system.
  • (Pete and Bear watch as Baddie agents file off the scare floor.)
  • Pete: An entire scare floor out of commission. What else could go wrong?
  • (Pete and Bear approach the coffee machine. Pete pours himself a cup of the thick gooey liquid.)
  • Pete: Oh, what a day.
  • Bear: We're just going through a rough time, sir. Everyone knows you gonna get us through it.
  • Pete: Tell that to the board of directors. (He drinks the liquid.) Bear, this company has been in my family for three generations. I would do anything to keep it from going under.
  • Bear: So would I, sir.
  • (Pete is suddenly struck with an idea.)
  • Pete: Say, I could use your help with something.
  • Bear: Anything, sir.
  • Pete: You see, we hired some new scare recruits, and frankly they're... They're... Uh...
  • Bear: Inexperienced?
  • Pete: They stink.
  • Bear: Uh-huh.
  • Pete: I thought maybe you might come by tomorrow and give them a demonstration, show them what it takes to be a top scarer. Huh?
  • Bear: (grinning) I'll start out with the old Pete Jump-and-Growl.
  • (Bear demonstrates the "old Pete jump and growl". Pete is so startled that he drops his coffee cup.)
  • Pete: Aaah! (amused) Ha-ha! Oh, yes. Now, that's my boy.
  • (Pete pats Bear on the shoulder. They laugh.)

Scene 8: End of the Day

  • (The sun sets over Monsters, Inc. A bell rings as the factory winds down. The "SCARE" light is turned off, and tired scarers emerge from doors.)
  • Percy Polie: (o.s.) Let's go, everybody. All doors must be returned. No exceptions!
  • (All doors are ejected and return to the vault.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoo! I've never seen anything like you today! You were on a roll, my man!
  • Bear: Another day like this, and that scare record's in the bag!
  • Mickey Mouse: That's right, baby!
  • Bear: Uh-huh.
  • (The overhead lights turn off as everyone leaves for the day. Mickey and Bear are at their lockers.)
  • Mickey Mouse: So, get this. As if dinner wasn't enough, I'm taking her to a monster truck rally afterwards.
  • Bear: Nice.
  • Mickey Mouse: What's on your agenda?
  • Bear: I'm going to head home and work out some more.
  • Mickey Mouse: Again? You know, there's more to life than scaring.
  • (Mickey sniffs under his arm.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whew! Hey, can I borrow your odorant?
  • Bear: Yeah, I got, uh, Smelly Garbage, or Old Dumpster.
  • Mickey Mouse: You got, uh, Low Tide?
  • Bear: No.
  • Mickey Mouse: How about Wet Dog?
  • Bear: Yup. Stink it up.
  • (Bear tosses Mickey the can of "odorant". Mickey and Bear walk down a crowded hallway.)
  • Mickey Mouse: You know, I am so romantic, sometimes I think I should just marry myself.
  • Bear: Give me a break, Mickey.
  • Mickey Mouse: What a night of romance I got ahead of me. Tonight is about me, and...
  • (Mickey spots Minnie tidying up her desk.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (love-struck) Minnie! Ooh, the love boat is about to set sail! (imitates boat horn, then, to Bear) 'Cause I gotta tell you, buddy, that face of hers, it just makes my heart go...
  • (As Mickey turns back to Minnie, he is surprised to instead see Kindly Lady.)
  • Mickey Mouse: YIKES!!!
  • Kindly Lady: (sternly) Hello, Mouse. Fun filled evening planned for tonight?
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, as a matter of fact--
  • Kindly Lady: And I'm sure you filed your paperwork correctly... for once!
  • (Mickey freezes.)
  • Kindly Lady: Your stunned silence is very reassuring.
  • (Kindly Lady walks away.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (to Bear) Oh, no, my scare reports! I left them on my desk! If I'm not at the restaurant in five minutes, they're going to give our table away! What am I gonna tell--?!
  • (Minnie leaps in and squeezes Mickey's cheek.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Schmoopsie-Poo.
  • Minnie Mouse: Hey, Googly Bear, wanna get going?
  • Mickey Mouse: Uh, do I ever. It's just that... Uh, you know it's...
  • Minnie Mouse: What?
  • Mickey Mouse: There's a small...
  • Minnie Mouse: I don't understand.
  • Mickey Mouse: It's just that--
  • Bear: It's just I forgot about some paperwork I was supposed to file. Mickey was reminding me. Thanks, buddy. Whew!
  • Mickey Mouse: I was? I mean, I was! Yeah, I was.
  • Minnie Mouse: Oh. Okay, let's go then.
  • Mickey Mouse: We're going! (whispers to Bear) On my desk, Bear. The pink copies go to accounting, the fuchsia ones to purchasing, and the goldenrod ones go to Kindly Lady.
  • (Minnie grabs Mickey and pulls him away. Mickey leans back.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Leave the puce!

Scene 9: Meet Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie

  • (The floor is dark and empty as Bear walks to Mickey's desk.)
  • Bear: (to himself) Pink copies goes to accounting, the fuchsia ones go to Kindly Lady. No, the fuchsia ones go to purchasing, the goldenrod ones go to Kindly Lady. Man, I have no idea what puce is...
  • (Bear picks up the reddish-brown paperwork files and shuffles through it.)
  • Bear: Oh, that's puce.
  • (Bear sees a lone door in a station. The door is white, and it has five flowers on it.)
  • Bear: Uh, hello? Anyone? There's a door here. Hmmm.
  • (Bear walks to the door. He's about to eject it when he notices that the light above the station is illuminated. It's active. Cautiously, he opens the door. Bear peeks into the room.)
  • Bear: (stage whisper) Hello? Hey. Psst. Anybody scaring in here? Hello? Yo.
  • (Nothing but crickets. Bear shrugs and shuts the door. Bear steps away from the door, examining it curiously.)
  • Bear: Hmmm.
  • (Suddenly, there is a thump noise behind him. Bear freezes. He turns around to see his tail being dropped by little kids named Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Leo: Hi.
  • (Bear screams, falling over backward. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie look up at Bear and smile. Bear tries to get away, but Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie grab his tail. Panicked, Bear picks them up with a pair of tongs and places them back in their room, closes the door and spins around... Only to discover that they're standing before him again. Bear yells. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie squeal with delight. He picks them up and carries them deep inside the room. Bear deposits Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie on top of their bed. They giggle. Bear runs out, but gets caught in a hanging mobile.)
  • Bear: Oh!
  • (He falls, trips over a laundry basket, slips on a rug, and is ejected out of Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's room. Bear slides out of the room, covered in toys and junk from Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's room. Suddenly, from the utility hallway, he hears a noise. Bear scrambles to his feet and takes off. As he runs, a line of toy duckies caught on his tail quack along after him. Gloomius enters, wheeling a cart of scream cans towards the door. Bear rushes to the toilets, stuffs Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's junk into the bowl, and flushes it down.)
  • Bear: Ahhhh...
  • (A second later it all comes back up, overflowing the toilet.)
  • Bear: Aaah!
  • (Bear runs to the locker room. He spots an open locker and stuffs the sopping kid stuff in. He closes the locker.)
  • Bear: Whew.
  • (Relieved, Bear turns and walks away. On his back, clinging to his fur, is Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. Bear rounds the locker bank and disappears from view. For a moment, all is quiet. One second later:)
  • Bear: Aaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!
  • (Bear runs back past the lockers, panic-stricken. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie chase him.)
  • June: Bear!
  • (Bear cowers on a bench, backed into a corner of the room. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie stand in front of him waving their arms. To Bear, they are like diseased rats.)
  • Bear: No, no, stay back.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie are distracted, playing with a hardhat. Bear finds an M.I. gym bag, scoops them up, and zips it closed. Holding the bag at arms length, he runs out of the room. Bear runs to Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's door, ready to toss Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie back in. As he reaches to open it, the knob rattles. Bear's standing in the middle of the Scare Floor. He's thinking of a place to hide. Gloomius emerges from the door, confused.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Hmmm.
  • (Gloomius ejects the door. As Gloomius walks away, the door rises, revealing Bear hidden behind it. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie wiggle inside the bag and make a peep.)
  • Quincy: Ahhh!
  • (Gloomius stops. He sneezes and continues on. As Gloomius exits the floor, Bear watches as Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's door disappears into the vault, and with it all hope of getting rid of Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. Bear grabs the gym bag and runs towards the exit.)

Scene 10: Harryhausen's Chaos

  • (CHOP! A cleaver chops through a piece of raw monster fish. This is Harry Hausens, a top Monstropolis eatery. Rabbit prepares elegant meals as waiters waltz by with Sushi. When new customers enter the restaurant, the waiters all yell.)
  • Waiters: いらっしゃいませ! ("Irasshaimase!" - meaning "Welcome!")
  • (Mickey and Minnie are seated in a romantic booth, laughing.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Oh, Mickey! I've had a lot of birthday - well, not a lot of birthdays, but this is the best birthday ever.
  • (Mickey gazes dreamily at Minnie. She grows self-conscious.)
  • Minnie Mouse: What are you looking at?
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, I was just thinking about the first time I laid an eye on you, how pretty you looked.
  • Minnie Mouse: (embarrassed) Stop it!
  • Mickey Mouse: Your hair was shorter then.
  • Minnie Mouse: Mm-hmm! I'm thinking about getting it cut.
  • (The snakes look panicked.)
  • Mickey Mouse: No, no! I like it this length.
  • (The snakes sigh in relief.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I like everything about you. Just the other day, someone asked me who I thought the most beautiful mouse was in all of Monstropolis, and you know what I said?
  • Minnie Mouse: (coy) What did you say?
  • Mickey Mouse: I said....
  • (Behind Minnie, Bear presses his face up to the window.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear?!
  • Minnie Mouse: Bear??!!
  • (Befuddled, Mickey looks to the window. Bear is gone.)
  • Mickey Mouse: No! No, no! That's not what I was going to say! I mean, well, sure, he's handsome, if you like the big guy, he's rugged.
  • Minnie Mouse: Mickey, you're not making sense.
  • Rabbit: (o.s.) いらっしゃいませ!
  • (Bear appears at the table and sits down.)
  • Bear: Hi, guys! What a coincidence, running into you here!
  • (Bear awkwardly squeezes into the booth next to Mickey, setting the gym bag under the table.)
  • Bear: Uh, I'm just going to order something to go.
  • Minnie Mouse: (annoyed) Mickey...
  • Mickey Mouse: (through gritted teeth) Bear...!!!
  • (Bear grabs a menu and whips it in front of his and Mickey's faces.)
  • Bear: I wonder what's good here. Hmmm.
  • Mickey Mouse: Get out of here! You're ruining everything!
  • Bear: I went back to get your paperwork and there was a door.
  • Mickey Mouse: What??!!!
  • (Mickey peeks around the menu, grins awkwardly at Minnie, then ducks back behind. Minnie's starting to steam. Her snakes rattle in annoyance.)
  • Mickey Mouse: A door?!!?
  • Bear: (nodding) Gloomius Maximus was in it!
  • Mickey Mouse: Wait a minute? Gloomius Maximus? (putting it together) That cheater! He's trying to boost his numbers.
  • Bear: There's something else.
  • Mickey Mouse: What?!!
  • Bear: Ooklay in the ag-bay.
  • Mickey Mouse: WHAT??!!
  • Bear: Look in the bag.
  • (Bear motions to the floor. Mickey ducks under the table, but there's nothing there.)
  • Mickey Mouse: What bag?
  • (Bear looks around frantically for the bag. Mickey sees something that make his eye go wide. Bear sees it too: The MI duffle bag is now giggling and hobbling away on little human kid-feet that poke out from the bottom of the bag.)
  • Bear: WOAHHH!! They don't have anything I like here, so take care, Minnie!
  • (Bear charges toward the bag, stumbling into a waiter.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Mickey, what's going on?
  • Mickey Mouse: Minnie!?? Please try to understand!
  • (As Mickey explains, he sees the bag tossed aside, revealing Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I have to... (he dashes off.) DO SOMETHING!!!
  • Minnie Mouse: Mickey?
  • (Crocker is about to take a picture of a happy monster couple.)
  • Crocker: (o.s.) Look happy. Okay, on three. One, two...
  • (The posing couple sees Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie pop up over Crocker's shoulder. They scream. Crocker looks up and sees Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Crocker: AAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! KIDS!!!
  • (Crocker's flash goes off, as the kids jump onto the counter. Everyone in the restaurant turns towards Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: (to the restaurant) Boo!
  • (Chaos ensues. Patrons scramble out the door, screaming.)
  • Flick Duck: Kids!!!
  • (Rabbit grabs a phone and dials.)
  • Rabbit: There are kids here! Human kids!!!!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie run carefree through the chaos in the restaurant, talking. Mickey runs headlong into a pile of take-away boxes. Minnie is caught up in the stampede of fleeing patrons.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (calling out) Googly Bear!!!!!
  • (Bear tries to grab Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie, but they playfully evade his outstretched arms.)
  • Bear: Come on! Oh! Heh!
  • (Mickey dashes in with a take-away box, which he uses to delicately scoop them up. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie pop their heads out of the take-away box and stick out their tongues at Bear.)
  • Annie: Pthbthbtht!
  • (Bear hesitantly pushes their heads down into the box and shuts the lid.)
  • Bear: Come on!!!
  • (Bear and Mickey run out of the restaurant, leaving the MI gym bag behind. Then they exit as patrons scramble.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Let's get out of here!
  • (The Baddie arrives in helicopters and vans.)
  • Baddie Agent #1: Please remain calm. This is not a drill.
  • Baddie Agent #2: We have an 835 in progress. Please advise.
  • Baddie Agent #3: Stand clear please.
  • (Playhouse Disney characters run amok, screaming. Minnie calls after Mickey.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Mickey? Mickey!
  • (Mickey spins around.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Minnie!
  • (A Baddie Agent steps in front of Minnie and herds her away.)
  • Baddie Agent: Please come with me.
  • Minnie Mouse: Ow, stop pushing!
  • (Mickey starts towards her.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey! Get your hands off my Schmoopsie-Poo!
  • (Bear grabs Mickey and yanks him away.)
  • Baddie Agent: Building clear. Ready for decontamination.
  • (Bear and Mickey run down the alley.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, I don't think that date could have gone any worse!
  • (BLAM!!! Behind them a giant green plasma dome envelopes the restaurant and glows ominously. Things just got worse.)

Scene 11: Back in the Apartment

  • (The same image of the restaurant becomes part of a news report, with the word, "KID-TASTROPHE!" superimposed over it, replacing the black circle with a yellow child inside. A newscaster talks to the camera.)
  • Newscaster: If witnesses are to be believed, there has been children security breach for the first time in monster history.
  • (A Baddie agent stands in front of the apartment buildings. A microphone is thrust in his face.)
  • Baddie Agent: We can neither confirm nor deny the presence of human children here tonight.
  • (With chaos behind them, panicked Playhouse Disney characters speak into camera.)
  • Flick Duck: Well, four kids flew right over me and blasted a car with its laser vision.
  • Interviewee #1: I tried to run from them, but they picked me up with their mind powers and shook me like a doll.
  • (A monster with dozens of eyes steps forward to corroborate)
  • Interviewee #2: It's true! I saw the whole thing!
  • (A scientist sits next to the anchor)
  • Scientist: It is my professional opinion that now is the time to PANIC!!!
  • (CRASH! Mickey and Bear's TV smashes to the floor. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's heads peek out over the set.)
  • Leo: (cheery) Uh-oh...!
  • (Bear and Mickey wear colanders, snorkel masks, and oven mitts for protection. They see Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie and scream, scrambling behind a chair for protection.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, they're coming! They're coming!
  • June: Boo!
  • Bear and Mickey Mouse: AAAH!
  • (Bear and Mickey flee over to the window. Outside, helicopters scan the area. Hurriedly Bear and Mickey yank the shades closed. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie totter towards them, talking. Mickey and Bear retreat in fear.)
  • Bear and Mickey Mouse: Aaaaaaah!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie open the window shade, standing in full view of the helicopters outside.)
  • Mickey Mouse: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Come here, kids!
  • (Mickey scoots them out of view using a broom, then sprays the area with disinfectant. Meanwhile Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie have discovered Mickey's CD collection, neatly arranged in two stacks.)
  • Mickey Mouse: No, don't touch those, you little--!
  • (The stacks come crashing down.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, now those were alphabetized!! It's okay, it's all right. As long as it doesn't come near us, we're going to be okay.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie sneeze directly in Mickey's eye.)
  • Mickey Mouse: AAH!!
  • (Mickey freaks, accidentally spraying disinfectant squarely into his own eye!)
  • Mickey Mouse: AAAAAAAAAAH!!!
  • (Now Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie approach Bear. Whimpering, he protects himself with a garbage can lid. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie point to a one eyed teddy bear, out of their reach.)
  • Bear: Oh, you four like this? Fetch!!!
  • (Bear tosses the bear across the room. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie run after it. They pick up the bear and hug it. Mickey gasps. This has gone too far.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, hey, that's it!! No one touches Little Mikey!
  • (Mickey angrily swipes the bear out of Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's hands. Stunned, their faces begin to redden, and their eyes well up with tears.)
  • Bear: Mickey, give them the bear.
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, no...
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie scream at the top of their lungs. Bear and Mickey cover their ears. The lights in the apartment surge. From outside, the apartment lights pulse brightly, creating a beacon for the helicopters. The circling helicopters head towards them. Mickey and Bear panic. Mickey drops the bear and runs to the window, pulling the shade shut.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Make it stop, Bear! Make it stop!!!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie continue to wail. Desperate, Bear offers her the bear.)
  • Bear: Here! Look! See the bear? Ooh, nice bear!
  • (It's not working -- they continue to cry. The helicopters are getting closer.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear...!!!
  • (Desperate, Bear begins to dance with the bear; anything to get them to stop crying.)
  • Bear: See? Ooh, bear, ooh! ♪ Oh, he's a happy bear. ♪ He's not crying, neither should you ♪ Or we'll be in trouble ♪ 'Cause they're gonna find us ♪ So please stop crying right now ♪
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie stop crying. The lights return to normal levels.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Good! Good, Bear! Keep it up! You're doing great!
  • (The helicopters turn around and begin to fly away.)
  • Bear: ♪ Ooh, ah, the happy bear, he has no... ♪
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie reach for the bear, accidentally touching Bear's hand. He screams.)
  • Bear: Bwaaaaah! Yaah! Oh, they touched me!! It touched me! Aaaah!
  • (Bear's yelling frightens the kids, who start crying again. The lights surge. Mickey runs toward Bear, reaching for the bear.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, the bear!!! The bear!! Give them the...!!!!
  • (Mickey trips on a lamp and flies across the floor.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoahhhhh!!!!
  • (Mickey rolls into a garbage can and bumps into a shelf, sending a stack of books into his mouth. A hanging stereo speaker lands on his head.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oof!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie think this is hilarious and begin laughing. The lights in the apartment glow even brighter than before. The region lit up by the laugh's power radiates outwards from Mickey and Bear's window. In a moment all the apartment windows are glowing brightly. The lights flare to a white hot brightness, and then POP! The laughter subsides, and all is dark.)
  • Bear: What was that?!
  • (Mickey is still wedged inside the garbage can.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I have no idea. But it would be really great if it didn't do it again.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie giggle again)
  • Bear: Shhhh!
  • Quincy: Shhhh.
  • Bear: Shhhh!!!
  • Annie: Shhhh.
  • (They smile)

Scene 12: Bedtime for Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie

  • (The room is lit by candlelight. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie sit at one end of the room coloring while at the other end Mickey and Bear hunker behind a chair, tossing her pieces of cereal.)
  • Bear: How could I do this? How could I be so stupid? This could destroy the company.
  • Mickey Mouse: The company? Who cares about the company? What about us?! That thing is a KILLING MACHINE!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie spin around in a circle, getting dizzy)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: La la la la la la la la…
  • Mickey Mouse: I bet they're just waiting for us to fall asleep, and then, WHAM!! Oh, we're easy prey, my friend, easy prey! We're sitting targets!
  • (They fall over. Mickey holds up a piece of paper.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, look, I think I have a plan here. Using mainly spoons, we dig a tunnel under the city and release it into the wild.
  • (Bear stares in disbelief.)
  • Bear: Spoons?
  • (Mickey crumples up the piece of paper, and tosses it onto a large existing pile of crumpled plans.)
  • Mickey Mouse: That's it. I'm out of ideas. We're closed. Hot air balloon? Too expensive. Giant slingshot? Too conspicuous. Enormous wooden horse? Too Greek!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie hold up a drawing.)
  • Leo: Look, Bear! We drew a picture of You, Me, June, Quincy, and Annie!
  • (Bear can't quite believe his eyes. The drawing is crude, but its unmistakenly a picture of Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie holding hands.)
  • Mickey Mouse: No plan... no plan... can't think... can't think. Flat-lining...flat-lining...
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie yawn.)
  • Bear: Uh, Mickey, I think they're getting tired.
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, then why don't you find some place for it to sleep (suddenly angry) WHILE I THINK OF A PLAN?!
  • (Bear speaks to Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie as though one might talk to a dog.)
  • Bear: Are you sleepy? You wanna sleep? Is that what you want? Huh?
  • (They blink sleepily. Bear leads a trail of cereal pieces into his room, and the Little Einsteins eat them. He puts some of the pieces on a newspaper as a little area for the Little Einsteins to sleep, but they stick with sleeping in Bear’s bed.)
  • Bear: Okay, all right, making a nice little area for you to-- (Bear hears a giggle. He turns around to find Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie in his bed.) No, hey, hey, that's my bed. You're going to get your germs all over it.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie snuggle into the covers.)
  • Bear: (sighs) Fine. My chair is more comfortable, anyway.
  • (Bear starts to walk out, but the kids whine anxiously.)
  • Leo: Bear, look!
  • Bear: What?
  • (They pointing to the closet)
  • June: It's Gloomius Maximus! He's in the closet door!
  • Bear: It's just a closet. Will you go to sleep?
  • (Annie holds up one of the Little Einsteins’ drawings.)
  • Annie: You see him, Bear?
  • Bear: Hey, that looks like Gloomius Maximus. Gloomius Maximus' your monster. You think he's gonna come through the closet and scare you. Oh, boy, how do I explain this? Uh, it's empty. See?
  • (Bear opens the closet. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie pull cover over their heads)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: YIKES!!
  • Bear: No monster in here. (he steps inside.) Well, now there is. But I'm not gonna scare you. I'm off duty. (he steps out.)
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie look into the closet intently. His little demp hasn't quite done the trick; they still afraid.)
  • Bear: Okay, how 'bout I sit here until you fall asleep?
  • (Bear closes the door and sits in front of the closet. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie stare back at him, wide awake.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Hmm...
  • Bear: Go ahead. Go to sleep. Hmm-hmm. Now. Now, go.
  • (They're not getting it. Bear tries to mime his words.)
  • Bear: Uh, you... go... to... sleep! (snore!)
  • (They giggle for a moment, then pass out. Bear breathes a sigh of relief. He watches the Little Einsteins sleep, a tiny figure in his giant bed. Funny, they don't look dangerous. Bear quietly walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him. In the living room, Mickey is in deep thought.)
  • Bear: Hey, Mickey, this might sound crazy, but I don't think those kids' dangerous.
  • Mickey Mouse: Really? Well, in that case, let's keep it. I always wanted a pet THAT COULD KILL ME!!!
  • Bear: Now, look, what if we just put them back in their door?
  • Mickey Mouse: What?
  • Bear: Mickey, think about it. If we send them back, it's like it never happened. Everything goes back to normal.
  • Mickey Mouse: Is that a joke? Tell me you're joking.
  • (Bear isn't kidding.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, I'd like to think that given the circumstances, I have been extremely forgiving up 'til now, but that is a horrible idea! What are we gonna do, march right out into public with those things? Then I guess we just waltz right up to the factory, right?
  • (As Bear listens to Mickey, his eyes are drawn to the violet fabric of his reclining chair.)

Scene 13: Sneaking Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie In

  • (The violet fabric of Bear’s chair has now been reconstructed into PB&J Otter costumes.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I can't believe we are waltzing right up to the factory! Bear, hair, ears, tails, and some colored otters and racoon fabric are not gonna fool anyone. Just think about a few names, will you? Loch Ness, Big Foot, Willie The Giant. They all got one thing in common, pal: banishment! We could be next!
  • Bear: Don't panic. We can do this.
  • (As they approached the lobby doors, Taxicrab emerges. Bear turns, keeping Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie hidden behind his back.)
  • Bear: Hey! How you doing, Taxicrab?
  • Taxicrab: Hey, guys.
  • (Bear and Mickey walk through the door into Monsters Inc.)
  • Bear: Everything's going to be okay.
  • (Baddie Agents are everywhere, combing the place.)
  • Baddie Agent #1: Number One wants this place dusted for prints.
  • (They inspect a garbage can.)
  • Baddie Agent #2: Careful with that.
  • (They hang from the ceiling.)
  • Baddie Agent #3: I got a good view from here.
  • Baddie Agent #4: A little lower...
  • (The lead Baddie agent shows the charred remains of the M.I. gym bag to Pete.)
  • Lead Baddie Agent: This was recovered at the scene.
  • (Mickey and Bear barely dare to move.)
  • Bear: Don't panic. Don't panic.
  • Mickey Mouse: Don't tell me not to panic. Everything is not okay. It's not okay!
  • Bear: Just keep it together. Stay calm.
  • Leo: Hey!
  • (Bear and Mickey turn toward the noise. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie are waddling up to Pete. Mickey and Bear are panic-stricken.)
  • Pete: (to Baddie) Gentlemen, safety is our number one concern. Now if there's anything that--
  • June: Excuse us, sir!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie tug on Pete's leg. He turns around, annoyed.)
  • Pete: Not now, not now, I'm-- (seeing Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie) Oh, hello, little ones. Where did you come from?
  • Bear: Pete.
  • (Bear and Mickey run up.)
  • Pete: Ah, Bear. Is this one yours?
  • (Bear quickly sweeps Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie in his arms.)
  • Bear: Ah, actually, that's my uh, little kids, The Little Einsteins, sir.
  • Mickey Mouse: Yeah, it's, ah, "Bring An Obscure Relative to Work Day".
  • Pete: Hmmm, must have missed the memo. Well, listen, Bear, why don't you stop by the simulator after lunch today and give us the scare demonstration we talked about, huh?
  • Bear: Oh! Sir, uh... today might be a little--
  • (The lead Baddie agent is anxious to get on with their work.)
  • Baddie Agent: Excuse me, Pete...
  • Pete: Yes, yes, I'm coming. (to Bear) All right, then, I'll see you this afternoon, Bear. That is, if these gentlemen hadn't shut us down.
  • (Pete exits with the Baddies.)
  • Bear: Oh, boy.
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, a scare demo. Well, that is great. Why am I the last to know? We can bring your little kids along. They'll be a big hit.
  • (As they walk off, a Baddie agent scans the area with a child detector. The agent points it towards the kid just as a Professor Ludwig Von Drake walks between them. The detector beeps.)
  • Baddie Agents: Halt! Stop him! Hold him down!
  • (The Baddie agents tackle Professor Ludwig Von Drake. Mickey and Bear look back at the melee, and scurry out.)

Scene 14: The Locker Room/Bathroom Break

  • (Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie appear cautiously from behind a row of lockers.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on, the coast is clear. Okay, all we have to do is get rid of those "things." So wait here, while I get its card key.
  • Quincy: But, Mickey, we can't stay here. This is the men's room.
  • (Mickey stares at Quincy one of the Little Einsteins as if he is insane.)
  • Mickey Mouse: That is the weirdest thing you have ever said. It's fine. It's okay. Look, it loves it here! It's dancing with joy!
  • (The Little Einsteins are indeed dancing.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (exiting) I'll be right back with its door key.
  • (Bear looks down at Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie who are wiggling and mumbling.)
  • Bear: Haha! That's a cute little dance you've got. It almost looks like you gotta--
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie lift their hoods of their costumes. Their faces are uncomfortably scrunched. Their hands grab at their "lower region.")
  • Annie: Bear, Can we please go to the bathroom?
  • Bear: (realizing) Ohhh, sure.
  • (Bear stands waiting in front of a bathroom stall. Inside, The Little Einsteins start to sing)
  • (Song starts)
  • Leo: ♪ Tale as old as time ♪
  • June: ♪ True as it can be ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ Barely even friends, Then somebody bends ♪
  • Annie: ♪ Unexpectedly, Just a little change ♪
  • Leo: ♪ Small, to say the least ♪
  • June: ♪ Both a little scared ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ Neither one prepared ♪
  • Annie: ♪ Beauty and the Bear, Ever just the same, Ever a surprise ♪
  • Leo: ♪ Ever as before, Ever just as sure, As the sun will rise ♪
  • June: ♪ Tale as old as time, Tune as old as song ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ Bittersweet and strange, Finding you can change ♪
  • Annie: ♪ Learning you were wrong, Certain as the sun ♪
  • Leo: ♪ Rising in the east ♪
  • June: ♪ Tale as old as time ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ Song as old as rhyme ♪
  • Annie: ♪ Beauty and the Bear ♪
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ Tale as old as time, Song as old as rhyme, Beauty and the Bear ♪
  • (Song ends)
  • Bear: Uh, are you done in there?
  • (Bear starts to poke the door open.)
  • Leo: (o.s) GET OUT, BEAR!!!, WE'RE NOT DONE YET!!!
  • Bear: Aah! Sorry! Sorry.
  • (Bear closes the door, embarrassed. The song continues.)
  • (Song starts)
  • Leo: ♪ Now that we've found you hear what we have to say ♪
  • June: ♪ One Song, We have but one song ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ One song, only for you ♪
  • Annie: ♪ One heart, tenderly beating ♪
  • Leo: ♪ Ever entreating, constant and true ♪
  • June: ♪ One love, that has possessed us ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ One love, thrilling us through ♪
  • Annie: ♪ One song, our hearts keep singing ♪
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ Of one love, only for you... ♪
  • (Song ends)
  • (The Little Einsteins finally flush a toilet)
  • Bear: Okay, you're finished now, right? Hello?
  • (He rushes in as the water in the giant toilet swirls around. Surely they're gone down. He's about to jam his arm into the bowl when...)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Boo!
  • (Bear spins around to find Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie standing behind him.)
  • Bear: (relieved) Whew!
  • (The Little Einsteins are wearing big goofy grins that say "Gotcha!" They start giggling, then scamper off to hide behind another stalls. Bear chuckles as he walks toward them.)
  • Bear: (over-selling) Where did they go? Did they disappear? Did they turn invisible? I just have no idea.
  • (They are giggling in their stall, enjoying the game. Bear pauses in front of her stall, then turns and opens it.)
  • Bear: Gotcha!
  • (It's empty!)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Boo!
  • (They peek out from a different stall.)
  • Bear: (genuinely impressed) Hey, you're good!
  • June: Thanks, Bear!

Scene 15: Gloomius Maximus' Plot

  • (Mickey prepares himself and walks towards Kindly Lady's station.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Be relaxed, be relaxed, be relaxed.
  • (Mickey approaches Kindly Lady's desk.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Kindly Lady, my tender, oozing blossom, you're looking fabulous today. Is that a new haircut? (Kindly Lady stares back at him, expressionless.) Come on, tell me. It's a new haircut, isn't it? That's got to be a new haircut. New makeup? You had a lift? You had a tuck? You had something? Something has been inserted in you that makes you look like...
  • (She's unmoved.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (sighs) Listen, I need a favor. Gloomius Maximus was working late last night out on the scare floor. I really need the key for the door he was using.
  • Kindly Lady: Well, isn't that nice? But guess what? You didn't turn in your paperwork last night.
  • Mickey Mouse: He didn't... I mean I... no p-p-paperwork?!
  • Kindly Lady: This office is now closed.
  • (Kindly Lady slams the front panel of her desk on Mickey's gloves.)
  • Mickey Mouse: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!
  • (Back in the bathroom, Bear crawls playfully along the row of stalls.)
  • Bear: Ready or not, here I come!! I'm getting warmer, any second now! FEE, FI, FOE-
  • (Mickey enters, rubbing his sore fingers.)
  • Mickey Mouse: WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!?
  • Bear: (standing) Uh, um, I'm looking for the kids.
  • Mickey Mouse: You lost them???!!
  • Bear: No, no, They are just--
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie run up and latch onto Bear's arm, whimpering.)
  • Bear: Here they are. (to Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie, comforting) Hey, what's the matter?
  • (Mickey and Bear hear Gloomius Maximus approaching.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (o.s.) Look, I already told your buddies I haven't seen anything!
  • Baddie agent: (o.s.) All right. Carry on.
  • (Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie duck into a stall and scramble atop the toilet to avoid being spotted. Gloomius Maximus enters the bathroom, growling. He washes his hands. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie see him through the crack in the door and gasp. Bear awkwardly does his best to comfort them. Splish! Mickey's shoe slips into the toilet water. Gloomius Maximus stops. Did he hear something?)
  • Screwy: (suddenly entering the room) Gloomius Maximus!
  • Gloomius Maximus: (startled) Aah!
  • Screwy: Thank goodness. What are we going to do about children?!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Will you... shhhh!
  • (Gloomius Maximus grabs Screwy's mouth, shutting him up. Gloomius Maximus disappears. Screwy looks around, confused. The **** stall door in the row suddenly slams open. Gloomius Maximus materializes. Screwy waits impatiently, pointing to the newspaper as Gloomius Maximus kicks open each stall door. The sextet shudders in the stall, awaiting their turn. Just as Gloomius Maximus is about to kick open their door, Screwy pops in front of him.)
  • Screwy: (impatiently) THE FRONT PAGE! It's on the front page! The children! The four you were after!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Will you be quiet?! Don't you think I'm aware of the situation? I was up all night trying to find it!
  • Screwy: I did a simple calculation factoring in the size of the sushi restaurant. The children may have escaped!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Yeah, well, until we know for sure, we're gonna act like nothing happened, understand? You just get the machine up and running, I'll take care of kids. And when I find whoever let it out, they're ****!
  • (Gloomius Maximus angrily hits the stall door. It swings open, exposing Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. It swings shut again.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (to Screwy) Why are you still here? COME ON! GO! MOVE! NOW!
  • Screwy: (flustered) Oh! Yes! I'm going! Ow! Ow! I'm not here!
  • Bear: (whispering) They're gone.
  • (Beat. Mickey slips. From behind the stall, toilet water splashes onto the floor.)
  • Quincy and Annie: (o.s.) Ewww.

Scene 16: The Wrong Door

  • (Mickey and Bear are taking Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie to the scare floor. Mickey's shoes are wet, and one of his shoe has toilet paper on it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: This is bad. This is so very bad.
  • Bear: What were they talking about a machine?
  • Mickey Mouse: Who cares?! Oh!
  • Leo: Look, Mickey, don't panic. All we have to do is call our door down and send our home.
  • Mickey Mouse: (after getting the toilet paper off of his shoe) You're right, kids, you're right. We're just two regular Joes on our way to work. We will blend right in.
  • Bear: (after hiding Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie behind his back again) Top of the morning, fellas.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, what's shakin', bacon?
  • Bear: Did you lose weight? Or a limb? (whispering to Mickey) You have their card keys, right?
  • Mickey Mouse: (whispering to Bear) Of course I have their card keys. I told you I'd get their card keys. I went and got their card keys, and now I have their card keys.
  • (He grabs a different card keys by mistake, and a different number comes up.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, here we go.
  • Bear: (to Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie) Take care of yourselves. Try not to run through anymore closets.
  • June: Well, of course, Bear!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie are playing with his mouth, and they all laugh. A brown wooden door comes down and it becomes activated.)
  • Bear: Mickey, that's not their door.
  • Mickey Mouse: What are you talking about? Of course it's their door. It's their door.
  • Bear: No, their door was white, and it had flowers on it.
  • Mickey Mouse: No. It must've been dark **** night, because this is its door.
  • (He opens the door, and there is polka music coming from the inside of the door.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, you hear that? Sounds like fun in there. Okay, send me a postcard, kids. That's Mickey Mouse, care of 22 Mickey-Mouse-You-Got-Your-Life-Back Lane.
  • Quincy and Annie: Mickey Mousey.
  • Mickey Mouse: Very good. Now, bon voyage. Bye-bye. Come on.
  • (Mickey pretends to wave a stick at Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's faces, as if they are dogs, and he throws it in the door.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Look at the stick. See the stick? Go get the stick. Go fetch.
  • (Then, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie angrily close the wooden door, and trying to prove that it's not their door.)
  • Leo: Come on, Mickey, this is not our door.
  • Mickey Mouse: What? Who, kids?
  • June: We are the Little Einsteins and we need to go home. Right, Bear?
  • Bear: Right. This is Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. That's... what I decided to call them. Is there a problem?
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, you're not supposed to name it. Once you name it, you start getting attached to it! NOW, PUT THOSE THINGS BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM, OR SO HELP ME--!!!
  • (Mickey halts abruptly. He, Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie look up to see the entire scare floor looking at them.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, hey! We're rehearsing a scene for the upcoming company play called, um, Put Those Things Back Where It Came From, Or So Help Me!
  • Quincy: Heh, heh... it's a musical!
  • Mickey Mouse, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ Put those things back where it came from, or so help me... ♪
  • Bear: (joining in.) ♪ Bom, bom, bom, bom... ♪
  • Mickey Mouse, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ So help me! So help me! ♪ And cut!
  • Mickey Mouse: Heh, heh.
  • Annie: We're still working on it. It's a work in progress.
  • Mickey Mouse: But hey, we need ushers!
  • (Everyone goes back to work.)
  • Leo: Mickey, Bear, we've had enough. Now, say goodbye to--...
  • (Mickey and Leo point to where June, Quincy, and Annie stood moments before they’re gone.)
  • Leo: Where'd it go? Guys, What'd you do with it?
  • Bear: (panicked) Where are they? Aah! June!, Quincy!, Annie!
  • Mickey Mouse: I don't believe it. They got away from you again?! Well, that is just--
  • Leo: (beat) Wait a minute, the sun is coming up. (brightening) This is perfect! Ha-ha! They're gone!
  • (Bear isn't listening. He scans for June, Quincy, and Annie, then takes off towards the entrance.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, hey, hey, hey, where are you going?
  • (Bear strides off, scanning the room as he goes. Mickey and Leo grab onto Bear's tail, trying to slow him down.)
  • Leo: Bear, please, don't blow this. Not when we're so close to breaking the record. Somebody else will find kids.
  • (Bear pulls Mickey and Leo into an adjacent hallway.)
  • Mickey Mouse: It'll be their problem, not ours. They’re out of our hair!
  • (Bear turns the corner and slams into Gloomius Maximus. Like silly putty, Gloomius picks up Bear’s fur texture and color.)
  • Leo: (gasps) It’s Gloomius Maximus! (runs away)
  • Gloomius Maximus: What are you two doing?
  • (Gloomius Maximus quickly changes back. Lance walks by.)
  • Lance: They're rehearsing a play.
  • Mickey Mouse:They're out of our hair!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Can it, Mouse! So, what do you think of those kids getting out, Bear? Pretty crazy, huh?
  • Bear: Oh, yeah! Crazy. Heh!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Word on the street is the kids' been traced back to this factory. You haven't seen anything, have you?
  • (Behind Gloomius Maximus, Mickey and Bear spot Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie emerging from behind an ash can. They scamper off down the hall.)
  • Bear: (nervous) Uh, well... uh... er, uh...
  • Mickey Mouse: No! No way! But, if it was an inside job, I'd put my money on Scootch Raccoon.
  • Gloomius Maximus: Scootch Raccoon?!
  • Mickey Mouse: Yeah, the one at station six. You know, he's got two eyes.
  • (Across the room, Scootch Raccoon turns and looks around revealing two eyes. Gloomius Maximus' eyes narrow. He heads off towards Scootch Raccoon.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Hey, Scootch Raccoon?! What time did you leave **** night?
  • (Bear heads off after Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. Mickey runs after him.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear?!!
  • Minnie Mouse: (o.s.) Mickey Mouse!?!
  • (Mickey gasps. Minnie is right in front of him, scuffed, bruised, and wearing an Elizabethan collar around her neck.)
  • Minnie Mouse: **** night was one of the worst nights of my entire life! Bar-none!
  • (Minnie's snakes hiss. They all wear little dog collars, too.)
  • Minnie Mouse: I thought you cared about me!
  • (Mickey shoots a look at Gloomius Maximus. Is he hearing this?)
  • Mickey Mouse: Honey, please. Schmoopsie, I thought you liked sushi..
  • Minnie Mouse: Sushi?!!! Sushi?!!!!! You think this is about sushi?!!
  • (This gets Gloomius Maximus' attention. He turns towards Mickey.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Shh... Schmoopsie... Heh heh... Shh, shh, shh....
  • (Panicking, Mickey grabs Minnie and kisses her to keep her quiet, but this only makes Minnie slap him. Gloomius Maximus looks down at his newspaper. The front page reads: KIDS SIGHTING AT SUSHI RESTAURANT. Gloomius Maximus studies the blurred photo of Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie in the restaurant. In the background of the photo, blurred but unmistakable, is Mickey!)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Mouse!
  • (Gloomius Maximus looks up, but Mickey is gone. Minnie lies on the ground.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (calling) Mickey!!!! Mi-- (bitterly) Men!

Scene 17: Mickey Mouse on the Run

  • (Mickey Mouse sprints through the hallways of Monsters Inc.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Breathe. Keep breathing.
  • (He zips past a water cooler, leaps over a trashcan, and scurries around a corner. He comes to a stop in front of a portrait of Pete, and breathes a sigh of relief. Gloomius Maximus uncamouflaged out of the painting.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Yikes!
  • (Gloomius Maximus grabs Mickey and pushes him against the wall.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Where are the kids?!
  • Mickey Mouse: (nervously looking around) Kids? Heh. What kids?
  • Gloomius Maximus: They're here in the factory. Isn't it?
  • (Mickey can't take the pressure.)
  • Mickey Mouse: You're not pinning this on me. It never would have gotten out, if you hadn't been cheating **** night!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Cheating?! I-- (A smile spreads across Gloomius Maximus' face.) Cheating. Right. Okay, I think I know how to make this all go away. What happens when the whistle blows in 5 minutes?
  • Mickey Mouse: Uhhh, I get a time-out?
  • Gloomius Maximus: Everyone goes to lunch! Which means the scare floor will be...
  • Mickey Mouse: Painted?
  • Gloomius Maximus: (losing it) Empty! It'll be empty, you idiot! You see that clock?
  • (Mickey nods. Gloomius Maximus grabs Mickey's arms, using them as a visual aid to drive home his point.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: When the big hand is pointing up,...
  • (Gloomius Maximus twists Mickey's arm. Ouch!)
  • Gloomius Maximus: ...and the little hand is pointing up,...
  • (Another twist and gasp from Mickey.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: ...the kids' door will be in my station. But when the big hand points down,
  • (This one really hurts.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (wincing) Ooooh!
  • Gloomius Maximus: the door will be gone. You have until then to put those kids back. Get the picture?
  • (Mickey nods in pain.)

Scene 18: The Trash Compactor

  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie in their disguises sprint happily through the hallways of Monsters Inc.)
  • (They zipping past yellow empty canisters and scurrying around a corner. They come to a stop to a stack of boxes next to a garbage can.)
  • Leo: Hey, guys.
  • June, Quincy, and Annie: Hi, Leo.
  • (Bear runs down the hall searching for Little Einsteins.)
  • Bear: (relieved) Kids!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie fall into the trash can.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Whoa!
  • Bear: No!
  • (Behind him, Bear hears...)
  • Baddie Agent #1: (o.s.) Hey, you! Halt!
  • (Bear freezes as two Baddie agents head towards him.)
  • Baddie Agent #2: He's the one.
  • Bear: (panicked) Uh...
  • Baddie Agent #1: The one from the commercial.
  • Baddie Agent #2: Affirmative, that's him.
  • Baddie Agent #1: Can we get an autograph?
  • Bear: (relieved) Oh! Oh, sure... no problem.
  • Baddie Agent #1: If you could make that out to Bethany, my daughter...
  • (The geeks, Donald and Goofy, emerge from a door, grab the trash can, and wheel it away. Bear notices this turn of events.)
  • Bear: Ah, yes! Let's see.... (signing quickly) "From your scary friend... Best wishes..."
  • (The geeks stop in front of a trash chute.)
  • Goofy: ...so then I said "if you talk to me like that again, we're through."
  • Donald Duck: Oh! What'd she say?
  • Goofy: You know my mom. She sent me to my room.
  • (Behind the geeks, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie climb out of the garbage. As they do, one of Pinch Raccoon's shoe pops off and lands in the trash. They running off down a hallway. Meanwhile, Bear has finished signing.)
  • Baddie Agent #1: Thanks a lot.
  • Bear: See you guys later. Take it easy.
  • (Bear turns to see the geeks dump the garbage into the chute. The Pinch Raccoon's shoe rests atop the garbage pile, making it look like Annie is in amongst the trash.)
  • Goofy: Bottoms up!
  • (Pinch Raccoon's shoe and trash go tumbling down the garbage chute. Bear gasps in horror. He comes hurling down the stairs, panting. Then he bursts into the room. From behind glass, Bear watches the load of garbage -- including Pinch Raccoon's shoe -- move towards a large smashing machine.)
  • Bear: (muffled) KIDS!!!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie going walking around a corner and start to sing)
  • (Song starts)
  • Leo: ♪ We're going on a trip ♪
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ In our favorite rocket ship, Zooming through the sky, Little Einsteins! ♪
  • Leo: ♪ Climb aboard ♪
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: ♪ Get ready to explore! There's so much to find, ♪
  • Quincy: ♪ Little Einsteins! ♪
  • Annie: Come on!
  • Leo: Let's go!
  • June: ♪ Little Einsteins! ♪
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: We need you, ♪ Little Einsteins... ♪
  • (Song stops)
  • (Suddenly, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie bump into Olie Polie one of Polie and Bevel Kids)
  • Leo: Hello, kids!
  • Olie Polie, Zowie Polie, Billy Bevel, and Binky Bevel: Hello, fellas!
  • (Ursa notices The Little Einsteins.)
  • Ursa: Oh. Well, hello there. What's your name?
  • Leo: Hi, Ursa!, I'm Leo! I like to conduct!
  • (Orchestra playing)
  • June: Go, Leo!
  • (Orchestra continues playing)
  • June: Bravo!
  • Annie: Good job, Leo.
  • June: Yeah!, I'm June. I love to dance.
  • (Song starts)
  • June: ♪ Dancy, dancy, dance. Dancy, dancy, dance.♪
  • (Song ends)
  • (June dances and twirls around the hallway)
  • Leo: Yay, June!
  • Quincy: Go, June!
  • Annie: That was good job, June!
  • Quincy: I'm Quincy. I love instruments. And here's my trumpet.
  • (Playing trumpet)
  • Annie: Yeah! Good job, Quincy!
  • Leo: That sounded great!
  • Annie: And I'm Annie. I love to sing.
  • Leo: Sing something, Annie.
  • (Song starts)
  • Annie: ♪ La, la, La. La, la, la. La, la, la, la, la. ♪
  • (Song ends)
  • Leo: Great singing, Annie!
  • June: Yay, Annie! That was great!
  • (Bear reacts in horror as the shoe and trash moves through a meat grinder, smashing hammers chooping blades, and under a large roller. Finally the machine spits out a compressed cube of garbage. The cube travels down a conveyor belt towards Bear. Atop the cube, still visible, is Pinch Raccoon's shoe. Bear reaches for it and faints. Mickey runs into the lobby, searching for Bear.)
  • Mickey Mouse: BEAR!!! Oh, Bear! (then he scans the bathroom) Okay, Bear. Come on, enough. (he sees Professor Buffalo and Wolfie) Hey! You guys seen Bear anywhere?
  • Professor Buffalo: Nope, sorry.
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, Bear! (he runs off)
  • Professor Buffalo: Boy, Mouse looks like he's in trouble.
  • (Professor Buffalo opens his locker. The toys and kid junk from Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's room -- which Bear stuffed in the night before -- fall out onto Professor Buffalo.)
  • Wolfie: (gasps) 23-19!! WE HAVE A 23-19!!!!
  • (Baddie agents burst out from the bathroom stalls.)
  • Baddie Agent: Halt!
  • Professor Buffalo: Oh, dear. (Professor Buffalo is taken down.)
  • (Mickey turns a corner, desperate now.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear! Bear!
  • (He spots Bear staggering along pathetically, cradling his "Pinch Raccoon garbage cube" in his arms.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear! Oh! Great news, pal. I got us a way out of this mess, but we gotta hurry. Where is it?
  • (Bear whimpers as he shows Mickey the cube.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, that's a cube of garbage. (he spots the shoe.) Uh-oh.
  • Bear: (sobbing) I can still hear their little voices.
  • The Little Einsteins: (o.s.) Meeska, Mooska, Mickey Mouse!
  • (Mickey leans in closer to the garbage cube.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, I can hear it too.
  • Polie and Bevel Kids: (o.s.) Meeska, Mooska, Mickey Mouse!
  • Mickey Mouse: How many kids you got in there?
  • The Little Einsteins, Polie and Bevel Kids: (o.s.) Meeska, Mooska, Mickey Mouse!
  • (Mickey and Bear turn to see a line of The Little Einsteins, Polie and Bevel children, led by Ursa. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie is at the end, still in their PB&J Otter costumes, minus one Pinch Raccoon's shoe.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Bear!
  • Bear: Leo, June, Quincy, Annie!
  • (Bear runs to The Little Einsteins. He tosses the cube, which lands on Mickey. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie hugging their tightly.)
  • Bear: Kids! Oh, you're all four right. I was so worried. I was-- (suddenly stern) Don't you ever run away from me again, kids.
  • Leo: We're sorry, Bear. It's all our fault.
  • Bear: (back to mushy) Oh, but I'm so glad you're safe.
  • Ursa: (sweetly) My, what an affectionate father.
  • Bear: Uh, actually, They're my, uhhh, little kids, The Little-
  • Mickey Mouse: (cutting him off) Okay, Bear, that's enough. Let's go.
  • (Olie Polie steps up to Mickey.)
  • Olie Polie:: Hey, Mickey!
  • Mickey Mouse: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Step aside, Olie Polie. We're in a--
  • (Mickey waves Olie Polie away. Without warning, Olie Polie bites him.)
  • Mickey Mouse: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!
  • (The Little Einsteins laughing hysterically at Mickey's pain. The lights overhead glow intensely, then burst. Polie and Bevel Kids scream.)
  • June: (angrily) Mickey, Will you please stop making us laugh?
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear's right! I didn't! So come on!
  • (Mickey frees his glove. He, Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie run down the hallway.)

Scene 19: Mickey Mouse Kidnapped

  • (Bear holds Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie as he and Mickey Mouse run down the hallway.)
  • Bear: I still don't understand. You've got the Little Einsteins' door?
  • Mickey Mouse: I'll explain later. Run.
  • (The Scare Floor is dark and empty; everyone is still at lunch.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay, let's move. Let's move, let's move! Come on!
  • (Mickey closes his eyes, not daring to hope...)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, please be there, please be there, please be there.
  • (Mickey opens his eyes and spots The Little Einsteins' door in a station.)
  • Mickey Mouse: There it is! Just like Gloomius Maximus said!
  • Bear: (stopping) Gloomius Maximus? Wait a minute.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie squirming out of Bear's arms and running off under a desk. Bear tries to calm them.)
  • Bear: Whoa, whoa, hey!
  • Mickey Mouse: 1, 2, 3, 4! Get those kids back through the door!
  • Bear: Hey, hey.
  • Mickey Mouse: We're gonna get our lives back. The nightmare is over.
  • Bear: Hey, it's okay, Kids.
  • (Mickey turns around and sees Bear.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, what's the matter? Come on, it's time to move.
  • (Bear lifts Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie from under the desk.)
  • Bear: Mickey, what are you thinking? We can't trust Gloomius Maximus. He's after The Little Einsteins.
  • Mickey Mouse: Who cares? Let's go. This is a limited time offer.
  • Bear: (surveying the floor) No, no. I don't like this.
  • Mickey Mouse: Look, Bear, you wanted their door, and there it is. Now, let's move!
  • Bear: No, Mickey.
  • (Bear holds onto Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie tightly.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (sighs) You want me to prove everything's on the up and up? Fine! (he storms toward The Little Einsteins' door.) He wants the door, I get the door. He don't want it now.
  • Bear: Mickey, wait!
  • Mickey Mouse: He's a paranoid delusional furball. (Mickey opens the door.)
  • Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Mickey...!
  • (Mickey enters the room and jumps on the bed. Suddenly a large box covers Mickey and snatches him away. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie gasp. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie quickly ducking under the desk. Gloomius Maximus peeks out of The Little Einsteins' room and emerges with the box. The Little Einsteims seeing Gloomius Maximus and gasping)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Uh-Oh!
  • (Bear gently shushes them. They nodding and going quiet. Gloomius Maximus loads the box into a tricked out hollow scream cart, slams the lid closed and heads for the hallway. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie watch Gloomius Maximus exit. Suddenly Quincy and Annie two of the Little Einsteins slip and fall forward with a noise.)
  • Quincy and Annie: Oof!
  • (Gloomius Maximus snaps to attention and disappears. Bear peers out from under the desk. Gloomius Maximus is gone! But where is he? A piece of paper slips off a nearby desk and flutters to the ground. Bear barely dares to breathe. On the other side of the desk, Gloomius Maximus silently uncamouflages. Neither one sees the other, but Gloomius Maximus is moving closer to Bear by the second. The lunch bell rings. Gloomius Maximus rushes off to his cart as monsters return from lunch. Bear grabs Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie and sprints after Gloomius Maximus as he pushes his cart out into the hallway.)
  • Percy Polie: Hey, Bear, where have you been all day? (as Bear runs past) Bear? Bear!
  • (Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie following Gloomius Maximus through the halls, barely able to keep up. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie following Gloomius Maximus around the corner to a dead end.)
  • Bear: (confused) Huh?
  • (Disassembled scream carts and tools sit idle; Gloomius Maximus is nowhere to be seen. Bear checks the carts for Mickey.)
  • Bear: Mickey? Mickey? Where are you? You in there? Where are you, buddy? Mickey?
  • Leo: Hey, June!, Quincy!, Annie!, Look!
  • (Meanwhile, Leo plays with some tools hanging on a work panel. Tugging on a wrench, Leo accidentally opens a secret panel, revealing a dark corridor.)
  • Leo: We opened the door, Bear.
  • Bear: Kids! Way to go!
  • June: Thank you.

Scene 20: The Scream Extractor

  • (Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie tiptoe down the dark passageway. Bear gasps.)
  • Quincy: It's okay, Bear.
  • (The doors slams shut behind them. Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie continue. They hears the echoey voices of Gloomius Maximus and Screwy, which grow clearer as Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie get closer to them.)
  • Screwy: (o.s.) Uhm, so to confirm, then, you did find the ah...
  • Gloomius Maximus: (o.s.) Yes! I got kids!
  • Screwy: Oh, huzzah! That's great news. N-n-not that I was concerned of course, I knew--
  • Gloomius Maximus: Just get over here and help me!
  • (Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie peer through a wall of pipes. They see Gloomius Maximus, Screwy and the scream cart.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Come on, come on, come on! While we're young here, Screwy!
  • (Gloomius Maximus and Screwy lift the box out of the scream cart.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (struggling) Kids need to take off a few pounds.
  • (They dump the box out into a chair, revealing Mickey. This is not what Gloomius Maximus was expecting.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Mouse! Where is it, you little one-nosed crettin?!
  • Mickey Mouse: Okay. First of all, it's cretin. If you're gonna threaten me, do it properly. Second of all, you're nuts if you think kidnapping me is gonna help you cheat your way to the top!
  • Gloomius Maximus: (chuckles evilly) You still think this is about that stupid scare record?
  • Mickey Mouse: Well... I did. Right up until... you chuckled like that... and, uh, now I'm thinking I should just get out of here.
  • (Gloomius Maximus clamps Mickey into the chair.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: I'm about to revolutionize the scaring industry. And when I do, even the "great" Bear is gonna be working for me.
  • Mickey Mouse: (weakly) Well, somebody's certainly been a busy bee.
  • Gloomius Maximus: First I need to know where kids are, and you're gonna tell me.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, I don't know anything!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Uh-huh. Sure.
  • (Gloomius Maximus nods at Screwy, who presses buttons on the console.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I-I don't! I mean, I don't.... Uh-oh.
  • (A large vacuum-like machine lowers from the ceiling.)
  • Mickey Mouse: What's that? Wait. Come on. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Oh, come on. No, no, no, no, no, no. Come on. Hey, hey, hey, hey. This thing is moving.
  • (The machine comes closer to Gloomius Maximus and Mickey.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I don't like big, moving things that are moving towards me. No! Come on! Hey! Gloomius!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Say hello to the scream extractor.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hello.
  • (Gloomius Maximus walks away from Mickey.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on. Where are you going? We-we'll talk. Come on, we'll have a latte. Come on. We can talk about this.
  • (Gloomius Maximus activates the machine. An oxygen-like mask inches towards Mickey's face.)
  • Mickey Mouse: What's that thing? What is that thing? Wait, wait, wait! No, no, no! Uh-oh! No! Come on, hey!
  • (Mickey screams. The device is now inches away from his face. Behind the pipes, Bear backs into the darkness with Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Help! Help!! Help!!! Help!!!! Oh...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! GYAH!!!!!
  • (The machine's suction pulls Mickey's lips closer, then suddenly stops, powering down with a whir. Mickey sighs, relieved. Gloomius Maximus turns angrily on Screwy.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Oh, for.... what did you do wrong this time?
  • Screwy: I don't know. I calibrated the drive shaft--
  • Gloomius Maximus: Go check the machine!
  • Screwy: There must be something wrong with the scream intake valve.
  • (Gloomius Maximus sighs, frustrated. On the back of the console, he sees the cords wiggling.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Huh?
  • (He follows the cords along the floor around the corner...)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Hmm...
  • (Gloomius Maximus sees that the machine has been unplugged. Screwy adjusts the machine. Mickey whispers to him.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Psst. Screwy. Screwy! You like cars? Huh? 'Cause I got a really nice car. If you let me go, I'll give you... a ride in the car. Please, Screwy?
  • Screwy: I'm sorry, Mouse, but Gloomius said I'm not allowed to fraternize with victims of his evil plot.
  • (Screwy is suddenly pulled up into the ceiling by a pair of large orange hands. Mickey smiles in recognition. Gloomius Maximus plugs the machine back in. It powers up. Gloomius Maximus enters to see Screwy strapped into the machine.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: What happened?! Where's Mouse?!
  • (Screwy struggles and grows pale as the machine does its work. Gloomius Maximus hits a switch on the console, turning it off.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Where is he?!
  • (A nearby albino Screwy points weakly towards the exit. Gloomius Maximus takes off angrily. Screwy collapses. Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie burst from the tool panel doorway and run down the hall.)
  • Bear: Come on.
  • Mickey Mouse: This is crazy. He's gonna kill us!
  • (They nearly bump into a group of Baddie agents, inspecting a trash can.)
  • Baddie Agent: (to fellow agent) Careful with that. Could be contaminated.
  • (Mickey, Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie do a quick detour, avoiding the Baddie.)
  • Mickey Mouse: We gotta get out of here NOW!!
  • Annie: We can start a whole new life somewhere far away!
  • Mickey Mouse: Goodbye, Monsters, Inc.! Goodbye, Pete!
  • (Mickey runs through a side exit door, out of the factory. Bear stops.)
  • Bear: No, Mickey, wait.
  • (Bear turns back the way they came.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, what are you doing?
  • Bear: Follow me. I have an idea.
  • Mickey Mouse: No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...

Scene 21: Bear Scares Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie

  • Computerized Voice: (o.s.) Simulation terminated. Simulation terminated.
  • Pete: (o.s.) No, no, no, no, no.
  • (Baxter Bevel is standing on one leg, sticking his tongue out at the animatronic kid.)
  • Pete: What was that? You're trying to scare the kid, not lull it to sleep.
  • (The recruits sit in their usual chairs, taking notes.)
  • Baxter Bevel: I was going for a snake/ninja approach with a little hissing. (hisses)
  • Pete: How many times do I have to tell you? It's all about PRESENCE!! About how you enter the room!
  • (Bear bursts into the room holding Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie and Mickey Mouse follows.)
  • Bear: Pete!
  • Pete: Bear! Perfect timing.
  • Bear: No, no, no, no. Sir, you don't understand.
  • Pete: Ah, now, show these monsters how it's done.
  • Bear: What? No, no, I can't... Sir, sir, you have to listen to me.
  • (Pete grabs Little Einsteins from Bear and hands them to Mickey Mouse.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Eeeh!
  • Pete: (to recruits) Pay attention, everyone. You're about to see the best in the business.
  • Bear: Sir, I...!
  • Pete: (to Mrs. Triangle) Reset the simulator.
  • Bear: But-But, sir!
  • (Pete positions Bear on the stage and steps behind the control panel. The lights in the room dim, and the animatronic kid resets.)
  • Mother: (o.s.) Good night, sweetheart.
  • Little Boy: (o.s.) Good night, mom.
  • Father: (o.s.) Sleep tight, kiddo.
  • (Mickey Mouse sets Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie down. They immediately run towards Bear on the stage.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: (happily) Bear!
  • Mickey Mouse: No, kids, no, no!
  • Pete: Now, give us a big, loud roar.
  • Bear: Pete, there's no time for this!
  • Pete: Come on, come on, what are you waiting for? Roar!
  • Bear: But-but-but, sir!
  • (Pete is determined.)
  • Pete: ROAR!
  • (With no other choice...)
  • Bear: RAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRR!!!!!!
  • (And a mighty roar it is. The animatronic screams. By now Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie have reached the stage, close enough to feel the full impact of Bear's roar. His glaring eyes and snarling teeth are genuinely horrifying. Bear has become a gruesome, terrible bear. Terrified, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's face widens in fear and they run to hide. The recruits are impressed.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Oh, no! RUN!
  • Pete: Well done. Well done, Bear.
  • (Bear sees them go.)
  • Bear: Kids?
  • (Pete and Mrs. Triangle escort the recruits out of the room.)
  • Pete: All right, gentlemen.
  • Mrs. Triangle: Right this way, everyone.
  • Pete: I hope you learned a valuable lesson in scaring today. Read chapters two and three in your manuals. I'll see you all in the morning.
  • (Bear finds Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie, hiding in the shadows, crying.)
  • Bear: Kids, What Happened?
  • (Bear reaches for Little Einsteins, trying to calm and reassure them.)
  • Leo: Just go away. (sniffles)
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie struggle to get away.)
  • Bear: Kids? Kids, it's me.
  • (They back away from Bear and trip over a cable. Their hood flop open, revealing their scared face.)
  • Annie: Oops.
  • Pete: (gasps) Children!
  • (Mickey Mouse rushes to explain.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Sir, they aren't toxic. I know it sounds crazy, but trust me.
  • (As Mickey continues, Bear approaches Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie, who are petrified.)
  • Bear: Kids? No, no, no, no, it's okay. What's wrong?
  • June: You scared us, Bear. (crying)
  • Quincy: Leave us alone, you monster. (sniffling)
  • Bear: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, don't be scared. That wasn't real. It's just a... I was just...
  • (Behind Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie are the bank of monitors, displaying a still image of Bear's fearsome roar. This is the way hundreds of children see him every night in their rooms. This is what Little Einsteins saw. Bear looks down on Little Einsteins, who are crying.)
  • Bear: Kids.
  • (They ran from Bear towards Pete, hiding behind one of his legs.)
  • Bear: Kids?
  • Mickey Mouse: ...this scream machine and he was going to test it out on those sweet, little kids.
  • (Mickey is still explaining the situation to Pete.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Now that we have them, he is trying to kill US! This whole thing is Gloomius' fault!
  • Pete: Gloomius Maximus?
  • Mickey Mouse: Yes. And we can take you to his secret lab, which is right here in this factory.
  • (Pete is stunned. He lets this information sink in.)
  • Pete: How could this happen? Oh, how could this happen? (beat) Does anyone else know about this?
  • Mickey Mouse: No, sir.
  • Pete: Good. This company can't afford any more bad publicity. (He picks up Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.) Now, before we do anything else, let's...take care of the children.
  • (Bear watches her with remorse.)

Scene 22: Banished

  • (Pete flips the switch and the simulator door and ejects, just like the Scare Floor. It travels away on an overhead track.)
  • Pete: Oh, I never thought things would come to this. Not in my factory. I'm sorry you boys got mixed up in this. Especially you, Bear. But now we can set everything straight again, for the good of the company.
  • (Bear tries in vain to catch the Little Einsteins' eyes. A huge metal door lowers into the station with a bang.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Uh, sir, that's not their door.
  • Pete: I know, I know.
  • (Gloomius Maximus uncamoflages in front of the door, and opens it. Snow swirls through from the other side.)
  • Pete: It's yours.
  • (Pete shoves Mickey and Bear through the door.)
  • Mickey Mouse/Bear: AAAAAHHH!!
  • (A blizzard rages. Bear and Mickey land face down in the snow. Pete stands in the doorway, holding Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. Bear makes a run for the door, but it's slammed in his face.)
  • Bear: No!
  • (Bear pulls the door open and sees only more snow. The portal to the monster world is closed.)
  • Bear: KIIIIIIIIDDDS!!!!!!
  • (Mickey and Bear are in the middle of a snowy mountain range. Panicked, Bear opens and slams the door, but nothing changes.)
  • Bear: No! No! No, no, no, no, NO!!!
  • (Behind him, Mickey watches angrily.)
  • Mickey Mouse: It's too late! We're BANISHED, genius!! We're in THE HUMAN WORLD!!! Oh, what a great idea; goin' to your old pal Pete! Too bad he was in on the whole thing! All you had to do, was listen to me, just ONCE!!! But you DIDN'T, did you?!
  • (Bear desperately runs his hands along the sides of the door, looking for anything that might activate it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: YOU'RE STILL NOT LISTENING!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAGGGGHHH!!!!!!!
  • (Mickey leaps onto Bear's back, sending both of them tumbling down the side of the snowy mountain.)
  • Bear/Mickey Mouse: AAHHH!!!!!
  • (Mickey continues to pound at Bear as they flip over an embankment, landing with a thud several yards below.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Take that!!!!
  • (Suddenly, a huge shadow covers them. They look up to see Willie the Giant!)
  • Willie the Giant: Welcome to the Himalayas!!!!

Scene 23: Welcome to the Himalayas

  • Willie the Giant: The giant! (chuckles) Can you believe that? Do I look the giant to you?
  • (Mickey huddles around the lantern for warmth because he's cold from being out in the snow for so long. He's wearing mittens on his ears, his gloves, and his shoes.)
  • Willie the Giant: Why can't they call me "Willie the Giant", or... or the "Willy the Giant", for crying out loud? I'm a nice guy. (offering) Snowcone?
  • (Willie the Giant holds out a tray of yellow snowcones.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (disgusted) Yeech.
  • Willie the Giant: Oh, no, no, no. Don't worry. It's lemon. (to Bear) How about you, big fella? Snowcone?
  • (Bear sits at the mouth of the cave, staring at his hands.)
  • Bear: (muttering to himself) Did you see the way they... looked at me?
  • (In anguish, he buries his face in his hands.)
  • Willie the Giant: Ah, poor guy. I understand. It ain't easy being banished. Take my buddy, Bigfoot. When he was banished, he fashioned an enormous diaper out of poison ivy. (chuckles) Wore it on his head like a tiara. Called himself "King Itchy".
  • (Mickey looks up at Willie the Giant as though he's insane.)
  • Willie the Giant: It won't be so hard for you guys, though, you know, I mean, how lucky can you get? Banished with your best friend.
  • Mickey Mouse: He is not my friend.
  • Willie the Giant: Oh, I just assumed you were buddies, you know, when I saw you out there in the snow hugging and all that...
  • (Mickey stares angrily at Bear.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Look at that big jerk. Ruined my life, and for what? (yelling at Bear) STUPID KIDS!!! BECAUSE OF YOU, I AM NOW STUCK IN THIS FROZEN WASTELAND!!!!!
  • Willie the Giant: Wasteland? I think you mean "Wonderland"! I mean, how 'bout all this fabulous snow, huh? Oh, and wait 'til you see the local village - cutest thing in the world. I haven't even mentioned all the free yak's milk...
  • (For the first time, Bear turns, his eyes alive.)
  • Bear: Wait. What did you say?
  • Willie the Giant: Uh, yak's milk. Milking a yak ain't exactly a picnic, but you know, once you pick the hairs out, it's very nutritious.
  • (Bear jumps up, runs across the cave, and grabs Willie the Giant.)
  • Bear: No, no. Something about a village. Where? Are there kids in it?
  • Willie the Giant: Kids? Sure. Tough kids, sissy kids, kids who climb on rocks...
  • (This diversion is more that Bear can handle.)
  • Bear: WHERE IS IT?!
  • Willie the Giant: It's at the bottom of the mountain. Around a three-day hike.
  • Bear: Three days?! We need to get there NOW!!!
  • (Bear punches the wall in frustration, sending a piece of ice across the floor. It stops in front of a pile of hiker paraphernalia piled in the corner of the cave. Bear's eyes light up. He has an idea.)
  • Willie the Giant: You wanna go to the village? Okay, rule number one out here: Always…no. Never go out in a blizzard.
  • Bear: We need to get to Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.
  • (SMACK! A snowball hits Bear in the back. Willie the Giant points to Mickey nervously - he did it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: LEO, JUNE, QUINCY, AND ANNIE?! WHAT ABOUT US?! (SMACK! Mickey throws another snowball.) Ever since those kids came in, you've ignored everything I've said, and NOW look where we are! (SMACK!) Oh, we were about to break the record, Bear. We would've had it made!
  • Bear: None of that matters now.
  • Mickey Mouse: None of it matters? Wa-wa-wait a second. None of it matters? Okay, that's - no. Good. Great. So now the truth comes out, doesn't it?
  • (There is an uncomfortable pause.)
  • Willie the Giant: Oh, would you look at that? We're out of snowcones. Let me... just go outside and make some more.
  • (Willie the Giant leaves.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, what about everything we ever worked for? Does that matter? Huh? What about Minnie? I am never... never gonna see her again. Doesn't that matter?
  • (Bear has finished building a makeshift toboggan. In silence, he slowly pushes it past Mickey.)
  • Mickey Mouse: And what about me? I'm your pal, I'm-I'm-I'm your best friend. Don't I matter?
  • Bear: I'm sorry, Mickey. I'm sorry we're stuck out here. I didn't mean for this to happen. But Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's in trouble. I think there might be a way to save them, if we can just get down to that--
  • Mickey Mouse: "We"? Whoa, whoa, whoa. "We"? No. There's no "we" this time, pal. If-if-if you wanna go out there and freeze to death, you be my guest. Because you're on your own.
  • (Mickey turns his back on Bear, folding his arms. There is nothing Bear can say. He turns and pushes the toboggan out of the cave. The cave grows dark. Mickey stares in disbelief. Bear is gone.)

Scene 24: Sled Ride

  • (Bear races down the mountainside on his makeshift sled. The lantern dangles from a ski pole on the sled, lighting the way as Sulley navigates the treacherous terrain. He zips by Willie the Giant, folding a fresh tray of snow.)
  • Willie the Giant: Hey, I got more snowcones!
  • (The sled is narrowly missing boulders, and picking up speed until...)
  • Bear: Whoa!
  • (Bear's sled smashes into a boulder, and bursts apart. He tumbles down the mountainside, finally sliding to a stop, face down in the snow. Bear lies motionless in the snow, the wind howling through his fur. A child screams in the distance. Or was that the wind? Bear slowly lifted his head. Another scream, this one louder than the first. Bear's eyes widen. Through the snow, Bear can barely make out a small Tibetan village.)

Scene 25: Bear Rescues Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie

  • (Professor Buffalo leans on his crutch, nervously trembling as he stands in front of his door with Wolfie.)
  • Wolfie: Oh, come on now, Professor Buffalo. I know you can do this. I picked out an easy door for you, in Nepal. Nice, quiet Nepal.
  • Professor Buffalo: (resolved) You know, you're right. (hands Wolfie his crutch) Here, take this.
  • Wolfie: Go get 'em, Professor.
  • (As Professor Buffalo gets to the door, Bear bursts through, trampling Professor Buffalo.)
  • Bear: Gangway! Look out! Coming through!
  • (Professor Buffalo lies flattened on the ground.)
  • Bear: (calling back) Sorry, Professor Buffalo.
  • Wolfie: What the--? Hey! You can't just-
  • (As Professor Buffalo staggers to his feet, Wolfie spots a sock stuck to his chest. Wolfie's eyes go wide.)
  • Wolfie: (Gasp!) 23-1...!
  • (Before Wolfie can finish, Professor Buffalo grabs him by the throat, stuffs the sock in his mouth, and tosses him in the door. Professor Buffalo relaxes, whistling happily as he walks away. Bear runs past various monsters in the hallway.)
  • Bear: Outta the way!
  • Handy Manny: Hey!
  • (Gloomius Maximus straps Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie into the scream extractor chair. They whimper as Pete looks on.)
  • Pete: (to Gloomius Maximus) Finally. I never should have trusted you with this. Because of you, I had to banish my top scarer!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Eh, with this machine, we won't need scarers. Besides, Bear got what he deserved.
  • Pete: Bear was twice the scarer you'll ever be!
  • (Gloomius Maximus glares at Pete. Bear rips off the door to the secret passageway and runs through. Screwy revs up the machine. Pete and Gloomius Maximus watch with anticipation as the machine nears Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's face.)
  • Leo: What's that thing? What is that thing?
  • June: Wait, wait, wait! No, no, no!
  • Quincy: Uh-oh! No!
  • Annie: Come on, hey!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie screams. The device is now inches away from their face.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Bear! Help!! Help!!! Help!!!! Oh...NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! GYAH!!!!!
  • (Just in time, Bear rushes in, roaring angrily. He grabs the Scream Extractor and forces it away from Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: (happily) Bear!
  • (Pete looks as if he's seen a ghost.)
  • Pete: Bear?!!
  • (With a massive effort, Bear wrenches the machine from its moorings and throws it towards Gloomius Maximus, Pete and Screwy. It pins them to the wall. Bear frees Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie from the chair.)
  • Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie: Bear! You're back!
  • Bear: I know. Sorry, kids.
  • (Pete turns to Gloomius Maximus, who has managed to escape.)
  • Pete: Gloomius Maximus, stop him!
  • (Gloomius Maximus camouflages, disappearing. Bear picks Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie up out of the chair.)
  • Bear: Let's get you home.
  • (Leo one of the Little Einsteins picks up Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie's door card key and runs towards the exit. Suddenly, Bear is knocked back into the room, as if punched by nothing.)
  • Pete: (o.s.) Finish him off!
  • (Bear keeps getting punched. He can't see where it's coming from. Behind him, a scream can rises into the air and hits him on the head. Bear falls to the ground, still holding Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie. Gloomius Maximus materializes, hanging from the ceiling.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: You don't know how long I've wanted to do that, Bear!
  • (Bear swings at Gloomius Maximus and misses. Using his tail as a whip, Gloomius Maximus sends Bear flying out into the hallway. Bear lands with a thud. Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie spilling out of his arms. They quickly hides in a crevice in the hallway. Bear is hit in the face with a snowball. He turns to see...)
  • Bear: Ooh! Mickey?
  • Mickey Mouse: Look, it's not that I don't care about those kids.
  • Bear: Mickey, you don't understand.
  • (Mid-sentence, Bear is attacked by an invisible Gloomius Maximus. Mickey continues his apology, obvious.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Yes, I do. I was just mad, that's all. I needed some time to think, but you shouldn't have left me out there.
  • (Bear is slammed against the wall.)
  • Bear: (winded) I'm being attacked!
  • Mickey Mouse: No, I'm not attacking you. I'm trying to be honest. Just hear me out. Look, you and I are a team. Nothing is more important than our friendship.
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie tug on Mickey Mouse’s arm, and points at the invisible Gloomius Maximus.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I-I know, kids. He's too sensitive.
  • (Invisible Gloomius Maximus chokes Bear, who gasps for air.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on, pal, if you start crying, I'm gonna cry, and I'll never get through this.
  • (Bear grabs futilely at his neck.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, but I am now.
  • (Bear is going to black out.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (annoyed) Hey, Bear, I am baring my soul here. The least you can do is pay attention!
  • (Mickey hurls his snowball towards Bear, but instead, it smashes Gloomius Maximus' invisible face, exposing him to view. Bear punches Gloomius Maximus, knocking him out. Gloomius Maximus collapses to the ground, becoming visible again. Bear gasps for breath.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, look at that, it's Gloomius Maximus. It's... (putting it all together) Ohhhhh.
  • Leo: Come on, Guys! Let's go!
  • (Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie running out of a crevice in the hallway.)
  • (Gloomius Maximus is beginning to come, too. Pete yells at him from behind the machine.)
  • Pete: Get up! There can't be any witnesses.
  • (Gloomius Maximus lifts himself off the ground)
  • Gloomius Maximus: There won't be.

Scene 26: Schmoopsie-Poo!

  • (Bear runs down the hallway, carrying Leo, June, Quincy, Annie, and Mickey Mouse.)
  • Bear: I'm glad you came back, Mickey.
  • Mickey Mouse: Somebody's gotta take care of you, you big hairball.
  • (A horrible scream gets Mickey's attention. It's Minnie Mouse! Snakes flowing wildly, she leaps through the air and tackles him to the ground.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Schmoopsie-Poo, I really can't talk.
  • Bear: Come on!
  • (Bear drags Mickey away. Minnie isn't about to be left behind again. She grabs Mickey's leg, and so is dragged after him.)
  • Minnie Mouse: Mickey, if you don't tell me what's going on right now, we are through! Do you hear me? Through!
  • Mickey Mouse: (being pulled from both sides) Okay, here's the truth! You know those kids these they're looking for? Bear let them in! We tried to send them back, but Pete had this secret plot, and now Gloomius Maximus' right behind us, and he's trying to kill us!
  • Minnie Mouse: YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT PACK OF LIES, MICKEY MOUSE?!?!!!
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie pop up from behind Bear’s shoulder.)
  • Leo: Hello There, Mickey Mouse!
  • Minnie Mouse: AAAAAAAAAAH!!!
  • (In terror, Minnie lets go of Mickey and she runs away as he and Bear round the corner towards the Scare Floor.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (calling back) I love you, Schmoopsie-Poo!
  • (Gloomius Maximus and Screwy coming running down the hall, crashing after Bear and Mickey. They trip over Treelo pushing a scream cart.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Will you move it?! Look out, you idiot!
  • (Minnie's eyes widen, then narrows in determination.)

Scene 27: The Door Vault

  • (Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie run onto the crowded Scare Floor and head for an empty station.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Look out. Coming through here! Coming through! Make way. Move it!
  • Bear: Sorry.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hurry up, hurry up!
  • (They swipe Little Einsteins’ card key and wait anxiously for their door to arrive. Gloomius and Screwy run out onto the Scare Floor.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: (spotting Mickey, Bear, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie) There they are!
  • (Bear, Mickey Mouse, and Little Einsteins turn at the sound of Gloomius' voice.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (over P.A.) Attention, employees: Gloomius Maximus has just broken the all-time scare record!
  • (Gloomius Maximus and Screwy are mobbed by a collection of excited employees, who trap the duo.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Huh? No, I didn't! Get out of my way!
  • (Minnie hangs up the intercom phone with a smile. Success!)
  • Minnie Mouse: Go get 'em, Googly Bear.
  • (Bear, Mickey Mouse, and Little Einsteins watch as Screwy and Gloomius Maximus struggle to break free of the crowd. The Little Einsteins' door enters the Scare Floor on the conveyor belt above.)
  • Leo: (pointing) There it is!
  • (Meanwhile Screwy is being tossed happily into the air by the celebratory group.)
  • Screwy: Whoa! Ha-ha!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Get off my peg leg! Let me through!
  • (Gloomius Maximus is finally able to push his way through the mob. He heads towards Bear. The Little Einsteins' door will not reach their station before Gloomius Maximus. Bear punches a red panic button on the keypad. An alarm sounds and The Little Einsteins' door, poised high above the station, heads back into the door vault. Bear runs toward in the next station over. All the doors are being returned to the vault.)
  • June: Bear, what are you doing?!
  • Bear: Grab on, Guys!
  • (Bear grabs the door as it sails out of its station. Mickey and The Little Einsteins manage to grab onto Bear's tail.)
  • Quincy: Are you out of your... (screams) ...miiiiiiiiiiind?!!!!!
  • (Gloomius Maximus watches the sextet cling to the door hanging overhead. He climbs aboard a door being ejected and sails up onto the track several door behind Bear, Mickey Mouse, and The Little Einsteins. The two dozen doors glide towards the vault. Bear, Mickey Mouse, and The Little Einsteins follow The Little Einsteins' door down a long corridor.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, what are we doing?!
  • Bear: We have to get The Little Einsteins' door and find a station.
  • Annie: What a plan. Simple, yet insane!
  • (Gloomius Maximus hangs from a door two behind him. He leaps forward one door, closing the gap. The corridor opens up onto a massive room. Millions of doors, as far as the eye can see, travel on overhead tracks.)
  • Bear: Whoa.
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, boy.
  • (Their door suddenly pitches forward.)
  • Bear: Hold on!
  • (They speed through the vault as if on a roller coaster ride.)
  • Mickey Mouse/Bear/The Little Einsteins: Aaaah!
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoaaaaa! Wowww!
  • Bear: Don't look down!
  • (The door pitches and twists dangerously as it is switched from track to track, The Little Einsteins enjoy the ride. The door turns, suddenly going into a ninety degree drop.)
  • Mickey Mouse/Bear/The Little Einsteins: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • (The red light on the door they're riding lights up and fades off. The track rounds a post.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm gonna be sick, I'm gonna be sick! Whoaaaaa! Oh, no!
  • (Ahead, a switched reroutes the doors onto multiple tracks, The Little Einsteins' door on one, their door on another.)
  • Bear: No!
  • (Gloomius Maximus' door switches onto yet another track. Bear visually follows The Little Einsteins' door. It stops, stacked against the wall of doors.)
  • Bear: The Little Einsteins' door!
  • Leo: There it is! How are we supposed to get to it now?
  • (Their door travels into a corridor of doors, surrounded on all slides, enveloping them in darkness. It slows to a stop.)
  • June: Oh, it's a dead end, Guys!
  • (From the other end of the tunnel of doors, Gloomius Maximus jumps onto a door and rides it towards them.)
  • Mickey Mouse: There he is!
  • (Bear gets the idea.)
  • Bear: Make them laugh!
  • Mickey Mouse: What? Bear....!
  • Bear: JUST DO IT!
  • Mickey Mouse: OH...
  • (Mickey Mouse pulls his eyelids out and snaps it back on his eyes.)
  • Mickey Mouse: OW!!
  • The Little Einsteins: (laughing)
  • (The light above their door illuminates. the doors surrounding them activate too. In fact, every door in the vault powers up, their lights glowing bright red. By now Gloomius Maximus is almost upon them.)
  • Bear: (re: their door) Get it open!
  • Mickey Mouse: Here he comes!
  • (The sextet jump inside and shut their door just as Gloomius Maximus leaps towards them.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Gimme those kids! (hitting the door) Ooof!
  • (It was a beautiful tranquil day in Hawaii. Bear, Mickey Mouse and Little Einsteins run out of a Hawaiian beach house, onto the sand.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Why couldn't we get banished here?
  • Quincy: Come on, Guys, we gotta find another door.
  • (They head onto a nearby beach house. Bear, Mickey Mouse, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie burst out of a door, hanging thousands of feet in the air.)
  • Bear: Woah!
  • (Doors are stacked in rows above and below them, like a wall.)
  • Leo: (pointing up) Look! There’s our door!
  • (Bear and Mickey Mouse climb from one door to the next, trying to reach The Little Einsteins' door. The Little Einsteins see Gloomius Maximus approaching from the Hawaiian door. They shut the door and shimmies up toward Bear and Mickey Mouse)
  • June: There he is! Hurry up! Hurry up!
  • Bear: Give me your hands!
  • (Leo's hand slips from Bear’s grasp, but he grabs Leo’s foot. Leo hangs precariously over the vault, thousands of feet in the air.)
  • Leo: Waaaaaah! WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh-oh Whoa-a! AAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!
  • (Bear pulls The Little Einsteins up into the door with him just as Gloomius Maximus emerges from Hawaii. Mickey Mouse, Bear, and The Little Einsteins come to a Japanese paper door. Their silhouettes are visible as they pause in front of it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on, it slides, it slides.
  • Annie: Oh, right, right, right.
  • (Annie slides the door open and they run through the room. They emerge again, this time through a door moving along the door track.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Jump! We’re right behind you!
  • (Bear and The Little Einsteins jump onto another track of doors below. Mickey Mouse follows. They land on a platform.)
  • Bear: Come on!
  • (Mickey Mouse looks back and sees Gloomius Maximus approaching.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hurry up! Keep moving!
  • (The only available door is on the ground, undergoing some sort of maintenance. The Little Einsteins open the door and motion for Mickey Mouse and Bear to jump in.)
  • Leo: Get inside, Guys!
  • (Because the door was lying sideways, Mickey Mouse's fall changes trajectory as he enters a French kid's room. He falls sideways onto the floor.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (grunts) Oof! That was weird. UGH!!!!
  • (Bear and The Little Einsteins fall through, landing on Mickey Mouse.)
  • Bear: (looking for Mickey Mouse) Mickey?
  • Quincy: (jumping up) Oh. Sorry, buddy.
  • Mickey Mouse: (punch-drunk) Ah, duui?
  • (Mickey Mouse, Bear, and The Little Einsteins run though the room and exit. Gloomius Maximus runs across the platform and jumps through the door on the ground. Gloomius Maximus lands in the same French kid's room, then continues after Mickey Mouse, Bear, and The Little Einsteins. Gloomius Maximus emerges. The door slams in his face. The Little Einsteins appear behind it.)
  • Annie: I hope that hurt, pirate boy!
  • (The Little Einsteins jump over to another door with Mickey Mouse and Bear. The six ride off across the vault.)
  • Leo: Great job, Annie, we lost him!
  • (Suddenly June slips through Bear’s arms and disappears, June screams.)
  • Bear: JUNE!
  • (Gloomius Maximus appears atop of the door, holding June in his arms.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Ha-ha!
  • Quincy: NO!
  • (Gloomius Maximus pulls out a pin from their door, sending it plummeting downward. Mickey Mouse, Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie stare up at Gloomius Maximus in disbelief as they fall.)
  • Bear/Mickey Mouse/Leo/Quincy/Annie: Aaaaah!
  • (Gloomius Maximus smiles down at them)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Nice working with you!
  • (Bear, Mickey Mouse, Leo, Quincy, and Annie struggle to hang onto the door as it plunges downward.)
  • Bear: GET IT OPEN!!!!
  • Annie: WE'RE TRYING!!!!
  • Mickey Mouse: OPEN THE DOOR!!!
  • (Leo, Quincy, and Annie are able to open the door and clamor in to the bedroom inside.)
  • Leo: COME ON, GET IN HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • (Leo, Quincy, and Annie pull Bear and Mickey Mouse through and shuts the door just moments before it smashes into tiny pieces on the floor, Gloomius Maximus jumps from door to door, holding June.)

Scene 28: Gloomius Maximus' Demise

  • (A pile of partially assembled doors starts to move, as if someone were stacked within it. The top door pops open and Bear jumps out, followed by Mickey Mouse, Leo, Quincy, and Annie. They run to the edge of the platform.)
  • Bear: June!
  • (Leo, Quincy, and Annie spot a pirate figure riding a door off in the distance.)
  • Leo: There they are!
  • (He runs to the end of the platform which sticks out precariously over a sea of moving doors like the prow of a ship. Bear climbs up and balances on its metal railing.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Bear, what are you doing?
  • Quincy: Bear!
  • (Timing is just right, Bear leaps out onto a passing door. Mickey Mouse, Leo, Quincy, and Annie follow, jumping onto doors behind him. Their doors join up with the "freeway" of doors above, speeding ahead.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Looks like we caught the express, Guys!
  • (Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie desperately scans the doors ahead.)
  • Annie: Do you see them?
  • Mickey Mouse: Straight ahead!
  • (Sure enough, Gloomius is heading towards the exit with June in tow. Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie jump onto a faster moving door on an adjacent track. They jump a second time but loses his grip, almost falling. The door tilts towards another track, banging into oncoming doors as they zip by.)
  • Bear: Whoa! Aaah!
  • Leo: Careful, Bear!
  • (Gloomius Maximus hears the commotion and turns around. He spots Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie, regaining his balance and closing in. Gloomius Maximus opens the door he's riding on and run into the room. Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie use their door like a pendulum to swing forward into the room after him. Bear, Leo, Quincy, and Annie burst through the door and spot June standing alone in the middle of the moonlit room.)
  • June: (gasps) Leo, Quincy, Annie!
  • Leo, Quincy, and Annie: June! We're back!
  • (Leo, Quincy, and Annie hugging June)
  • Bear: Come on, kids. Let's go. (Gloomius swings down from the rafters, kicks Bear and sends him tumbling backward out of the open door. Bear just barely gets a hand-hold on the lip of the door.) Aah! Aaah!
  • (Gloomius Maximus stands ands menacingly Bear, who holds onto the bottom of the door for dear life.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Look at everybody's favorite scarer now, you stupid, pathetic waste! (Gloomius Maximus stomps on one of Bear's hands, knocking it off the door edge. Bear dangles by one arm as the door speeds through the vault. The Little Einsteins cower at the back of the room, afraid. Gloomius Maximus steps on Bear's other hand. Bear hangs on with just two fingers.) You've been #1 for too long, Bear! Now your time is up! (Seeing their bear in danger, The Little Einsteins face changes from fear to anger. Gloomius Maximus prepares to push Bear off for the last time.) And don't worry. I'll take good care of those kids!
  • Bear: No!
  • (Horrible screaming get Gloomius Maximus' attention. It's The Little Einsteins! They leap through the air and tackle him to the ground.)
  • Bear: (lifts himself back up into the room.) Go get ‘em, kids!
  • (The Little Einsteins and Gloomius Maximus hit the ground and roll the room, locked in room wall.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Okay, come on! You kids want a piece of me?!
  • (The Little Einsteins land a punch that sends Gloomius Maximus' head spinning around.)
  • (The Little Einsteins' lunge with all their might. They smacks Gloomius Maximus in the face, making it SQUEAK with every blow.)
  • (The Little Einsteins bite Gloomius Maximus' hand.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Owwwww!!!
  • (The Little Einsteins pound on Gloomius Maximus' chest with the baseball bat.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: Ouch!!!
  • (Bear grabs Gloomius by the neck, wrestling him like an alligator. Gloomius writhes and wiggles, but Bear is able to subdue him.)
  • The Little Einsteins: Roar! Roar!!
  • Bear: (to Gloomius) They’re not scared of you anymore.
  • The Little Einsteins: ROOOAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Bear: Looks like you're out of a job.
  • (Gloomius Maximus gulps. Mickey place a door near the edge of the platform, opens it, and crouches down in front like a baseball catcher.)
  • Mickey Mouse: All right, come on, over the plate, let's see the old stuff here, pal. Come on, now, chuck him, chuck him, baby, hum, baby. Hum, baby. Here's the pitch...
  • (Bear prepares to toss Gloomius Maximus through the door.)
  • Gloomius Maximus: No, no, wait! Please! Don't! Don't! Don't! (Bear pitches Gloomius Maximus through.) NOOOOOOO!
  • Mickey Mouse: And he is... outta here! (He slams the door closed.)
  • (A dilapidated trailer sits swamp-side. We see silhouettes of Stanley, his Mom, and Gloomius Maximus.)
  • Stanley Griff: (o.s.) Mom, A pirate got in the house.
  • Stanley's Mom: (o.s.) A pirate?! Gimme that shovel! Come here!
  • (Stanley’s Mom beans Gloomius on the head with the shovel.)
  • Stanley Griff: Get it, mom! Get that pirate!
  • Gloomius Maximus: Oww!
  • (Bear smashes the light on top of the door.)
  • Bear: Care to do the honors, Mickey?
  • Mickey Mouse: With pleasure.
  • (Mickey pushes the dilapidated door over the side of the platform. It falls and smashes at the bottom of the vault.)
  • Annie: Bye-bye, Gloomy Gus.
  • Bear: That's right, kids. You did it. You beat him.
  • (Leo holds a conductor's baton)
  • Leo: Mission Completion!
  • Bear: (turning to leave) Come on!
  • (Bear, Mickey, and The Little Einsteins climb onto The Little Einsteins' door.)
  • Bear: Okay, Little Einsteins, it's time to go home. Take care of yourselves and be good kids, okay?
  • The Little Einsteins: Okay.
  • (Mickey opens the door, but sees only other doors stacked behind it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Oh, no!
  • Bear: The power's out. Make them laugh again.
  • Mickey Mouse: All right, I got a move here. It'll bring down the house. Up!
  • (Mickey jumps gracefully into the air and does a flip, landing crotch first on top of the metal door track.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (in pain) Hehh?
  • (Bear notices that The Little Einsteins' hood is down.)
  • Bear: (lifting The Little Einsteins' head) Oh, sorry, they didn't see that.
  • Mickey Mouse: WHAT?! What'd you do, forget to check if their stupid hood was up, you big dope?!
  • June: (angrily) Mickey, What are you talking about?!
  • Annie: Don’t yell in front of us.
  • Leo: They still need us to laugh.
  • Mickey Mouse: Right. (laughs) Hey, kids, just kidding. Look!
  • (Mickey closes the door on his face, squishing it and making a goofy face.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (through smashed lips) Hello, kids!
  • (Nothing from The Little Einsteins, who are not in the mood to laugh now.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Funny, right? (chuckles) See, with the... (annoyed) These are the jokes, kids.
  • (The Little Einsteins' door jerks violently and heads off towards the exit. Mickey, Bear, and The Little Einsteins hang onto the door as it moves.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Whoa! What's happening?
  • Bear: Hold on!

Scene 29: Tricking Pete

  • (Pete stands at an empty door station with Little Einsteins’ card key in his hand. He addresses a group of Baddies.)
  • Pete: When the door lands in this station, cut the power. You'll have those children, and the criminals responsible for this whole mess.
  • (Little Einsteins’ door sails out of the vault corridor and into the Scare Floor. Bear, Mickey, Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie peek out from behind the door and see Pete and the Baddies below.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (stage whisper) Great. A welcoming committee! What are we gonna do?
  • Leo: (whispers) I have an idea.
  • (The door lands in the station. The power shuts off.)
  • Baddie Agent: This is the Baddies. Come out slowly with these children in plain sight.
  • (Bear, Mickey, and The Little Einsteins wear PB&J Otter costumes emerge from behind the door.)
  • Leo: Okay, okay! Everyone. You got us.
  • June: Here we are. We're the kids.
  • Quincy: We're cooperating.
  • Annie: But before you take us away, We have one thing to say:
  • (Mickey sticks his tongue out. There's a sock on it!)
  • Mickey Mouse: (throwing sock) Catch!
  • (It lands on an agent in the middle of the pack! The frenzied Baddie agents pounce on the agent with the sock.)
  • Baddie Agents: (all shouting) 23-19! We have a toxic projectile! Isolate the contaminate!
  • (The Little Einsteins pop their door out of its station and head for the exit.)
  • Leo: Come on, Guys! Follow us!
  • (Bear, Mickey, and The Little Einsteins take off. The Baddie agents see this and chase after them.)
  • Baddie Agent #1: Halt! After the suspect!
  • Baddie Agent #2: Cover the area! Bring in reinforcements!
  • (Pete takes up the rear.)
  • Pete: Stop them!
  • (Pete and the Baddies lunge after Bear, Mickey, and The Little Einsteins like wild animals. Bear, Mickey, and The Little Einsteins race down the hall, and their door. Pete and the Baddies clamber after them, closing in.)
  • Pete: Bear! MICKEY! Give me the children!
  • Mickey Mouse: No, Sir! We're not giving the children!
  • Baddie Agent #3: And give them to us!
  • Mickey Mouse: NEVER! (runs away)
  • Pete: (snarls) Baddies, stop the mouse and I’ll take care of the bear!
  • Baddie Agent #4: Alright, Pete!
  • (The Baddie agents chase after Mickey.)
  • (Bear bursts through the door of the Simulator Room, Pete close behind. The Little Einsteins break a pipe off the wall and slides it through the door handles just as Pete slams against the door. The Little Einsteins lends the pipe around the handles to secure it. They frantically remove the door that's currently in the station.)
  • Pete: (slamming against the door) Open this door! OPEN THIS DOOR!
  • (Bear replaces the simulator door with Little Einsteins’ door. Pete scratches at the doors.)
  • Pete: BEAR!!
  • Bear/The Little Einsteins: Aaaah!
  • Pete: Don’t do it!
  • (Bear pushes a button on the door station keypad, picks The Little Einsteins up and runs inside.)
  • Bear: Come on!
  • (Bear looks back at Pete.)
  • Pete: (Shouting) DON'T GO IN THAT ROOM!!!
  • (Bear closes the closet door behind him. Pete yells and beats against the Tryout Room door. Bear stands over the bed, tucking in the sheets.)
  • Bear: I think we stopped him, kids. You're safe now. You be good friends, okay?
  • (SLAM! Bear turns to see Pete standing in the room, closing the door behind him.)
  • Pete: This has gone far enough, Bear!
  • (Bear stands protectively in front of the bed.)
  • Bear: They're home now! Just leave them alone!
  • Pete: I can't do that! They're seen too much. You both have.
  • Bear: It doesn't have to be this way.
  • Pete: I have no choice! Times have changed. Scaring isn't enough anymore.
  • (Pete closes in on Bear, rising up on his legs intimidatingly.)
  • Bear: But kidnapping children?!
  • Pete: I'll kidnap a THOUSAND children before I let this company die! And I'll silence ANYONE WHO GETS IN MY WAY!
  • (Pete smacks Bear, sending him flying to the floor.)
  • Bear: NO!!
  • (Pete grabs the mechanical simulation child from the bed.)
  • Little Boy: (o.s.) Good night, mom.
  • Mother: (o.s.) Good night, sweetheart.
  • Little Boy: (o.s.) Good night, mom. Good night, mom.
  • Pete: What is this?! What-?! Who-?! Huh-?!
  • (Pete blinks, uncomprehending. The child isn't The Little Einsteins at all, but the Animatronic Kid from the simulator. The wall of the bedroom begins to rise.)
  • Computerized Voice: (o.s.) Simulation terminated. Simulation terminated.
  • Pete: Wha...?!
  • (Behind the fourth wall of the simulator, the tryout room is filled with roboted Baddie agents. Mickey sits in the evaluator's chair.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I spotted several big mistakes.
  • Pete: (stammers) B-but...H-How'd you--?!
  • Mickey Mouse: You know what? Let's watch my favorite part again, shall we? (he rewinds the tape and plays it.)
  • Pete: (on tape, repeating) I'll kidnap a THOUSAND children before I let this company die!
  • (Pete sees himself on the monitor)
  • Pete: What...?! Wha...?!
  • Pete: (on tape, repeating) I'll kidnap a THOUSAND children before I let this company die!
  • (The Baddie agents discuss the situation.)
  • Annie: (peeks out from under the bed.) Hey, Bear.
  • Bear: Shhhh!
  • Annie: (whispers) Sorry. (She crawls back.)
  • (The Baddies walk onto the stage and grab Pete.)
  • Baddie Agent: I'll get him. All right, come with us, sir.
  • Pete: W-what are you doing? Take your hands off me. You can't arrest me!
  • (The Baddie agents lead Pete out of the simulator room.)
  • Pete: I hope you're happy, Bear. You've destroyed this company. Monsters, Incorporated is dead! Where will everyone get their scream now?! The energy crisis will only get worse because of YOU!
  • (The doors slam shut, leaving Bear clearly troubled by Pete's words.)
  • Lead Baddie Agent: Stay where you are. Number one wants to talk to you. (to other Baddie) Attention!
  • (Bear and Mickey exchange a confused look. A parade of agents enter the room, standing at attention. As the last two enter, they make room for...)
  • Kindly Lady: Hello, boys.
  • (Bear and Mickey's mouths drop open.)
  • Bear/Mickey Mouse: Kindly Lady?!
  • Kindly Lady: Two and a half years of undercover work were almost wasted when you intercepted those children, Mr. Bear. Of course, without your help, I never would have known that this went all the way up to Pete.
  • (The Little Einsteins scamper up to Bear. Nearby Baddie agents nervously step away.)
  • Kindly Lady: Now, about the kids...
  • (Bear scoops Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie up in his arms.)
  • Bear: I just want to send them home.
  • Kindly Lady: Very good. (into wrist communicator) Bring me a door shredder.
  • June: What, you mean... You mean, he can't see us again?
  • Kindly Lady: That's the way it has to be. I'll give you five minutes.
  • (Bear looks at The Little Einsteins and sighs. The Little Einsteins seem to understand.)

Scene 30: Goodbye

  • (Bear activates Little Einsteins’ door. The light illuminates. Mickey taps Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie lightly on each shoulder. He holds out his hand, formally.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, so long, kids.
  • The Little Einsteins: Awww, Mickey Mouse!
  • (The Little Einsteins give Mickey a big hug. He tenses, then relaxes and hugs them back.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Ah, kids, it's been fun.
  • (The Little Einsteins wave bye-bye to Mickey as they turn back to Bear.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Go ahead. Go grow up.
  • (Bear smiles down at The Little Einsteins. Ready, Bear opens their door.)
  • Quincy: Awesome!
  • (The Little Einsteins run into the room, happy to be home.)
  • June: It's beautiful!
  • Annie: Come on, Bear. (She pulls Bear into their room and hands him various toys, each one with a new sense of excitement.)
  • Bear: Uh... Kids... um...
  • Quincy: Here, you can have my Rolie Polie Robo Bear.
  • Bear: Oh, look at that. Yeah, you know—-
  • June: You can have my Kim Possible doll.
  • Bear: Oh, that's cute. Yeah...
  • Annie: Take my Luxo ball.
  • Bear: uh... Kids...
  • Leo: Here’s my Stitch doll.
  • Bear: Well, that's very nice.
  • (Bear realizes it's up to him to say goodbye. He grabs them playfully and flies them like an airplane to their bed.)
  • Bear: Come here, you!
  • (The Little Einsteins giggle wildly as Bear deposits them in bed. he tucks the Rolie Polie Robo Bear in next to them.)
  • Bear: ♪ Oh, he's a happy bear... ♪
  • (The Little Einsteins look to their closet and point.)
  • Leo: Look at our closet, Bear.
  • Bear: Nothing's coming out of the closet to scare you anymore, Right?
  • (Leo, June, Quincy, and Annie smile and give a little nod. Bear tickles their chin.)
  • Bear: Yeah. Goodbye, kids.
  • The Little Einsteins: Bear.
  • Bear: Bear has to go.
  • (The Little Einsteins give Bear a big hug and Bear hugs them back. Bear sets them back in bed, then walks slowly to the door. He looks back at them one more time. The Little Einsteins watch him sadly from their bed. Bear turns away, slowly closing the closet door after him. The Little Einsteins climb down from their bed. They run to their closet and open it.)
  • The Little Einsteins: Gotcha!
  • (The Little Einsteins jump in front of the open door, but only sees their closet with their stuff in it.)
  • Annie: Bear?
  • (The portal to the monster world has closed. In the simulator room, The Little Einsteins' door is shredded.)
  • Kindly Lady: None of this ever happened, gentlemen. And I don't want to see any paperwork on this.
  • (Kindly Lady and the Baddie Agents exit. Bear and Mickey share a silent moment. Mickey notices a single piece of The Little Einsteins' door on the floor. He hands it to Bear. Bear clasps the small chip in his large hand. Outside the factory, The Baddie agents shut Pete into the back of the van and drive away. A large crowd of MI employees murmur with concern about what will happen now.)
  • Donald Duck: I bet we get the rest of the day off!
  • Goofy: YOU IDIOT! They're gonna shut down the factory!
  • (Several Playhouse Disney characters gasp. Bear and Mickey walk out into the evening light.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm telling you, pal, when that wall went up, you should've seen the look on Pete's face. Hoo-hoo! I hope we get a copy of that tape.
  • (Mickey looks up at Bear. His buddy looks pretty sad.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, you all right? Come on, pal, cheer up, we did it. We got The Little Einsteins home. Ah, sure we put the factory in the toilet, and... gee, hundreds of people will be out of work now. Not to mention the angry mob that'll come after us when there's no more power. But hey, at least we had some laughs, right?
  • (As Mickey continues walking, Bear slowly comes to a stop, an idea forming in his mind.)
  • Bear: Laughs!

Scene 31: The Laugh Floor

  • (A kid sleeps in bed. Soft moonlight illuminates the room. A shadow cuts across the bed sheets. The silhouette of a large mouse with circular ears rises up over he bed. The kid sees the mouse and gasps. Suddenly, the whine of microphone feedback fills the room.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, is this thing on? Hello. Hello. Testing, testing.
  • (The kid turns on a light, revealing Mickey, sitting on a stool, microphone in hand.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, good evening, how are you? Nice to see you. I'll tell you, it's great to be here in... your room. Where are you from?
  • (The kid stares at Mickey, confused.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Never mind. You're in kindergarten, right? Oh, I love kindergarten. Best three years of my life.
  • (No response. Is that supposed to be funny?)
  • Mickey Mouse: (forging on) Of my life. But I love sports. Dodgeball was the best. Oh, yeah, I was the fastest one out there. Of course I was the ball...
  • (The kid looks on, skeptically. That was worse than the last joke. Mickey knows he's dying.)
  • Mickey Mouse: ...but I... was the ball... see? All right.
  • (Mickey stands up, tosses the microphone in his mouth and swallows it. Amplified stomach gurgles are heard while he waits. He finally lets out a huge burp, projecting the microphone out of his mouth and catching it.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (what do you think) Huh?
  • (The kid howls with laughter. Mickey grabs the stool and heads for the closet door.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, thanks a lot! I'll be here all week. Remember to tip your waitresses.
  • (The Scare Floor has now officially become The Laugh Floor. Mickey smiles as a gigantic can fills with laughs.)
  • Bear: Great job, Mickey. You filled your quota on the first kid of the day.
  • Mickey Mouse: Not bad, huh? You know, only somebody with perfect comedic timing could produce this much energy in one shot.
  • Bear: Uh-huh. And the fact that laughter is ten times more powerful than scream had nothing to do with it.
  • (Mickey clears his throat, sheepishly.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (o.s.) Oh, Googly Bear...! Come here, you!
  • (Minnie calls to Mickey from a nearby desk. Mickey tosses the microphone and runs to her.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Schmoopsie-Poo!
  • Minnie Mouse: Googly...
  • (Minnie kisses Mickey on his mouth, and he feels loved by that. Minnie's snakes begin kissing Mickey, too, and it tickles him.)
  • Minnie Mouse: (scolding snakes) Girls, girls! Ple- stop, stop, stop. (coyly) Mickey, you're such a charmer.
  • Mickey Mouse: Hey, did you bring the magazine?
  • Minnie Mouse: They just delivered a whole box.
  • Mickey Mouse: Let me see it! Ha ha ha! Bear and I made the cover, right?
  • (He opens the box and we see: "BUSINESS SHRIEK" magazine. The lead article, "MONSTERS, INC. BACK ON TOP!" shows Bear in full view. Mickey's face is totally obscured by the bar code.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (in shock) I don't believe it.
  • Minnie Mouse: (sympathetic) Googly Bear.
  • (Mickey lifts up a copy of the magazine and holds it in front of him.)
  • Mickey Mouse: I'm on the cover of a magazine! OW!!
  • (Tigger inserts chattering teeth into his mouth as he walks into a closet door. Screwy puts on a pair of two-eyed grouch glasses.)
  • Screwy: Oh, this is great!
  • (Professor Buffalo walks by carrying a watermelon and a mallet. Baxter Bevel backs out of a door, jacks sticking from his butt. Laughter emanates from the kid's room, filing the tank. Satisfied, Baxter bounces a soccer ball and smiles. Bear makes his way to the end of the hall. He surveys the fruit of his labors. Laughter emanates from all the doors. Workers happily move giant scream cans tell each other jokes, juggle and enjoy themselves. A graph on Bear's clipboard shows first year profits going through the roof. But Bear's smile fades. taped to the clipboard backing is the now tattered picture The Little Einsteins drew of themselves and Bear. Below is the wooden chip from their door.)
  • Mickey Mouse: (o.s.) Hey, Bear.
  • (Bear covers the picture as Mickey approaches.)
  • Bear: Ah! Hey, uh, Mickey. I was, uh...
  • Mickey Mouse: Well, listen, if you got a minute, there's something I want to show you. Okay? Close your eyes, follow me.
  • Bear: (hesitating) I...
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on. No peeking!
  • (Bear follows Mickey with a sigh.)

Scene 32: Kitty

  • (Mickey backs into the room, leading Bear along.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Keep coming, keep coming, keep coming. Come on, keep coming, keep coming...
  • Bear: (eyes closed) Mickey...
  • Mickey Mouse: Come on, and follow the sultry sound of my voice. Okay, stop. Open 'em.
  • (Bear opens his eyes. Before him sits Little Einsteins’ reconstructed door, meticulously glued back together.)
  • Mickey Mouse: Ta-da!
  • (Bear stops, scarcely able to believe what he's seeing.)
  • Bear: Mickey? Is that....
  • Mickey Mouse: Sorry it took so long, pal. There was a lot of wood to go through. (His hands are covered with splinters and band-aids.) You know, it only works if you have every piece.
  • (The door is clearly missing a piece. Bear looks down to his clip board where the sliver of The Little Einsteins' door is taped. Bear fits the piece into the door. It fits perfectly. The red light above the door glows. Mickey smiles and steps aside. Bear reaches for the door-knob. The door opens. Bear's nervous face is hit with light as he scans the room.)
  • Bear: Kids?
  • The Little Einsteins: (o.s.) Bear!
  • (Bear smiles.)
  • (Screen fades)
  • The End.
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